Individually Yours

04/07/2024

Today we held a very small, personal farewell in the garden at Doran Court.

The sun was shining, we raised a glass of red in a toast to a loved one and we sat for a while after our very beautiful little service, hearing even more stories of the life we had been celebrating.

It really was a very special day ♥️

There are no rules about a funeral service and there are so many ways to make your farewell to a loved one so personal.

Of course, it always helps when your Funeral Director also loves the personal touch 🥰

With thanks to for their care, thought, flexibility and their beautiful garden 🌷🌸🌻

15/05/2024

Wouldn’t it be lovely to say farewell in the sun. Outside, relaxed, fresh air, gentle breeze.
Without the stress, without the hurry up.

If you’d like to talk to us about a farewell for your loved one in our meadow, in our cottage garden or in our beautiful Barn, just get in touch.

Come and see us, the kettles always on 💕

10/05/2024

This morning I sat and cried my eyes out.

I was busy writing a funeral service for a lovely little old lady. Sun shining through the window, cup of coffee by my side, playing Northern Soul to spur me on. All of a sudden, the track 1-2-3 by Len Barry played. It was a song that we had on 7 inch vinyl in the house when I got my first record player as a kid and I will forever associate it with my Mum and Dad. I imagine them singing it together as a newly married couple. Not a care in the world. Just in love.

We lost my dad almost 30 years ago and it just goes to show that you never really get over losing someone you love so much and how something like music so easily triggers emotions held deep inside.

I write this, just to remind those who have lost loved ones, that you’re not on your own. We understand the sadness and the rollercoaster ride you’re on. And it’s ok.

And as I sit here now with a huge smile on my face, remembering all of the wonderful things about my Dad, I remind myself that the saying, ‘Grief is the price we pay for love’ is so true. It hurts, but its true.

Forever in my heart Dad, love always ♥️

07/05/2024

We were asked recently, if alcohol is allowed in the Barn. ‘Of course!’ we said.

The Barn is a wonderful place to hold a farewell and a wake in one place.

A toast can be part of proceedings and we find that the atmosphere can be so much more relaxed and informal, right from the start. Plus, everyone can stay for the whole time if they’d like to, without getting lost en route to the gathering afterwards.

You never know when you’ll have to plan a funeral for a loved one. Remember, we’re here to help you, if you ever need us.

26/04/2024

Tonight’s the night!!

If you’re looking for the most idyllic wedding venue with a barn, paddock and cottage garden at your disposal, then you really have to come along and see what Hookhouse Farm has to offer.

Meet wonderful local suppliers too and possibly get everything for your special day sorted in one fell swoop! Wouldn’t that be exciting!

Pop along between 4 and 7 this evening. Bring your bridesmaids, your future in-laws and your imagination!

The Prosecco is chilling in the fridge and the sunshine is on order ☀️

Events by Helen Outwood Butchers

22/03/2024

17/02/2024

🐰 Easter Egg Appeal 🐰

At Surrey and Suss*x Crematorium
In conjunction with Spotted: Crawley

Please drop off your Easter eggs at the office within the crematorium Monday - Friday, 9-5

Or DM us on here to find out other drop off locations.

🐰🐰🐰🐰🐰🐰🐰🐰🐰🐰🐰

27/09/2023

All welcome. Please share with others who may want to come to our peaceful service of remembrance.
Thank you 💕

21/09/2023

ALL WELCOME 🩷🩵

Surrey & Suss*x Crematorium is holding its 1st
Service of Remembrance for families who have lost a baby or child, to raise money for Abigal's Footsteps & 4Louie.
In collaboration with stonemans funeral directors & celebrant Mandy cook.

🩷🩵 Please share 🩵🩷

https://facebook.com/events/s/service-of-remembrance/958726252093935/?sfnsn=scwspmo

*xcrematorium

04/09/2023

Taking centre stage today for a service full of love and laughter.

It’s the best feeling when a family has the courage to bring in so many personal touches. Just loved this one ♥️

With thanks to my friends at *xcrematorium for making my day 😘

29/08/2023

Before I became a celebrant I worked in a very niche industry. I was very lucky to be involved in font or typeface design for most of my working life and over the years worked with some incredibly talented and interesting people and some amazing brands.

It’s quite a rare thing, fonts, so to find two families on the same day, who also had family members involved in the font world was, well, unbelievable.

In the first family, the deceased’s husband and father both worked for Monotype, as had I. Arguably the most famous type company in the world.

In the second family, the deceased himself had been a typesetter in the advertitising world, busily preparing type for print advertisements in the 50’s and 60’s.

What a small world huh? 💕

20/06/2023

When an Order of Service on it’s own isn’t quite enough, why not consider a funeral favour?

Today’s was fabulous. A huge custard cream for a custard cream lover and a box of forget me not seeds.

They’re simple, yet so personal and, so different.

What would you have in yours? 💕

31/05/2023

How will you continue the celebration of your loved ones life?

Cup of tea at home? Glass of something at the pub? Maybe a nice afternoon tea at a local hotel?

If you have your celebration of life with us, you don’t have to go anywhere else. You can say farewell in our beautiful, warm Barn and then continue to share memories over more tea, more beer or more fizz for as long as you want.

It makes everything so much more relaxed, stress free and personal.

Farewells at the Barn, a different way to say goodbye ♥️

*x

18/03/2023

My little helpers today. They certainly made me smile 🥰

14/02/2023

Lovely to see Stuart today from International College of Professional Celebrants UK 😊

Thanks for bringing the sunshine with you 🌞

08/02/2023

On average, 111 children lose a parent in the U.K. every day and yet death is still a taboo subject.

We teach our children about s*x, drugs and online abuse but not about a part of nature that affects us all.

Most likely, arranging a funeral for a loved one is something that we will all have to deal with at some stage in our lives. Don’t we owe it to our children to teach them a little about it?

If you agree, please sign and share this petition. Every signature helps 💕

Schools should be required to provide age-appropriate education to help children understand death as a part of life, as part of compulsory Relationships education. On average 111 children in the UK lose a parent every day.

04/02/2023

Family visit this morning and I was treated to the most amazing cup of coffee and these beautiful biscuits, sent with love, all the way from New Zealand.

Yep, they tasted as good as they look 💕

20/12/2022

A beautiful service at this evening, lighting candles to remember our loved ones 💕

Mince pies, mulled wine and incredible carols from the Nutfield Church Choir.

Special thanks to Grace, Kate and Emma for being wonderful hosts.

Thank you to all who attended and gave so generously. Over £300 raised for St Catherines Hospice 💕

16/12/2022

Tonight at 7pm there is a candlelight Carol service at Surrey and Suss*x Crematorium, for those who wish to light a candle in memory of their loved one’s.

There will be refreshments served, and everyone is welcome to attend.

With thanks to the lovely team at the Crematorium and Karen Willis for arranging this for all ♥️

26/11/2022

Farewells at the Barn.

Something just a little bit different 💕

There were twenty services at our local Crematorium yesterday. Even with two chapels, that was a busy day.

Twenty families trying to get parked, twenty families trying to find shelter from the cold and twenty families dashing off to find a hot cuppa or something a little stronger, at a gathering afterwards.

Thankfully, there is now an alternative way to say farewell without the crowds, without the rush and with a lot more peace and comfort.

Farewells at the Barn.

Contact us for more information.

23/10/2022

A question from our community.

How can we have music at the Barn?

A great question, thanks for asking it!

Despite the Barn being 17th Century, fortunately our technology is a little more modern. We have access to online music providers which means we should be able to get hold of any music you would like to have played.

We have speakers and microphones too!

If you would like to have music played live, we can help to arrange musicians and we even have an incredible singer available (former star of the West End no less!)

Your funeral arranger and celebrant will help you with all of the arrangements.

15/10/2022

A question from our community.

How would it work then, having a Farewell at the Barn?

A great question, thanks for asking it!

As with every Stoneman led funeral, it’s all about family wishes.

Here’s an example of how a Farewell at the Barn COULD run.

Guests arrive and mingle in the Barn.
Arrival of the hearse.
Loved one is welcomed into the Barn.
Funeral service takes place (which could include the playing of music, reading of poems, sharing of tributes and many other personalised ways in which to celebrate life).
Guests continue to enjoy the Barn as they spend time with others during the part of the day, more commonly referred to as the wake.
When ready, the hearse will arrive and your loved one will make a grand exit and travel onwards to your chosen crematorium or burial site.
Guests are able to remain at the Barn until the agreed time for departure.

Every step of this list is determined by the wishes of the family.

Your funeral arranger and celebrant will help you with all of arrangements.

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07/10/2022

So what could be better than a local venue that is warm, comfortable, dry and uniquely appealing, to say farewell to your loved one.

A place to gather and linger as you share stories and memories over a cup of tea, or maybe something a little stronger and pay due respect to the one you have loved and lost.

No time constraints, no rushing. Their favourite music played throughout, a chance for anyone who would like to, to say a few words and of course, just the right amount of time for quiet reflection.

There is nothing better than Farewells at the Barn.

A collaboration between HookHouse Farm, Stoneman Funeral Service and Individually Yours, along with a host of incredible local suppliers. Bringing you the opportunity to say your farewell a little bit differently.

A funeral service and memorial in one, at your own pace, in your own, exclusive setting.

07/10/2022

Telling stories and sharing memories is a wonderful way to celebrate the life of someone you have loved and lost. Visual tributes are a beautiful way to tell the story of a life - a slideshow of pictures spanning the years - often with one or two funny ones to raise a smile.

Sometimes a family may bring items to show - a guitar, bags of sweets for everyone, some knitting, a favourite hat or a bag of golf clubs.

Memory tables give the chance to elaborate further, with a curated collection of items to support the story telling. Perhaps there’ll be hearts to write on to say your own personal farewell.

All you need, is the time to absorb and appreciate it all and to say that last farewell at your own pace.

With thanks to
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05/10/2022

For some people, the shorter the funeral service the better. They feel it’s hard to say goodbye to someone they love as it is and so the quicker it’s over and done with, the less painful it will be. But for others, it’s a huge part of the grieving process. Spending time with those who have known your loved one, can be hugely comforting.

These days, the wake venue seems to be a good place to continue the celebration of life. But sadly, not everyone follows you from the crematorium to the pub or club, and the large, warm gathering often dwindles.

Wouldn’t it be so much easier to stay in one place for the whole thing? Perhaps that’s why some people are opting for alternative venues these days. Local hotels, the chapel belonging to the Funeral Director or even in a beautiful garden.

British weather permitting of course…

With thanks to
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04/10/2022

Have you any idea how long the average funeral service is at your nearest, or chosen crematorium?

Half an hour? An hour maybe?

For us in the South East, it’s between 20 and 40 minutes. Yes. 20-40 minutes to say goodbye to someone you’ve maybe spent your whole life with. How do you say all that you need to say about someone and the impact they have had upon you all, in just 20 minutes?

Surprising isn’t it. But, it doesn’t have to be like that…

03/10/2022

Arranging a funeral service for someone you love is never easy.

There are so many options for funerals that it can seem overwhelming.

If you have a faith, you’ll probably opt for a Church or place of worship for the service. If not, the majority of people these days choose the local crematorium, yet many find services at the crematorium to be impersonal and that the time slots are restrictive.

But, it doesn’t have to be like that…

With thanks to

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02/10/2022

Something very beautiful is about to happen to funerals and memorials in Surrey. And I am so excited!

Watch this space…

23/09/2022

And just as we ventured down the path to the natural burial ground, the Heavens opened. Thankfully, I had my trusty cemetery boots on.

We scattered petals to Abba tracks and everyone went their merry way afterwards, for a hot cup of tea.

I looked like a drowned rat, but can’t stop singing to myself, ‘I’m too s*xy for my boots…’ 😊

01/08/2022

A very special service today for a couple who loved each other dearly and who we hope will be together, hand in hand, for eternity.

Their very talented daughters created beautiful sprays with flowers from their garden, one for Mum and one for Dad ♥️

❤️