Fun, full of zest and curiousity, I am a Celebrant who loves to tell your stories.
01/07/2025
π Mourning Brew - Bereavement Friendship Group π
π A reminder of our second group next Tuesday (8th July), I'm hoping to be able to support lots of people to move through their grief journey and also to make their world a little bigger as they meet other people with shared experiences.
π Please do share this on your socials and spread the word that we are ready and waiting to welcome anyone who is feeling lonely after a loss.
π Updates to follow :)
30/06/2025
π Monday Motivation - Perfection π
π Have you met the version of myself I carry day to day?
You know, the one who is always presented impeccably, eats well and doesn't binge on chocolate, always knows whats happening in her week and doesn't forget anything.....you know, the calm, focused, professional, knowledgeable one???
And then there's the reality......
π The real me that often has a head so full of stuff I'm planning weeks ahead and filling my diary with reminders, I often forget what I'm saying because I then worry about the stuff that I've already planned, the real me that is sometimes so exhausted masking that she is in control of everything that all I really want to do is watch pig racing on YouTube and scoff Percy Pigs whilst I recharge my batteries!!
π Because the truth is Perfection is nonsense, it doesn't exist. What does matter is
πΈ You show up - even on the tough days. especially on the tough days.
πΈ You make time to listen to people and leave them feeling recognised.
πΈ You take time to recognise the things that went well, and learn from those that didn't.
πΈ Plan your activities - start with the end in my mind. Need to be at the appointment for 5pm Tuesday, where will you park, what time do you need to get there to allow time to do that, do you need cash or can you pay via app?? Work it all out in advance means it won't come as a shock when that appointment comes round.
πΈ Recognise that sometimes your 8am motivational posts are not going live until 11:30 because you had a day off and forgot to schedule the post in time - so what, nobody died!!
π As I sit here, letting my perfection go, I'm in my pyjamas, on my 2nd cup of coffee and about to structure my next week, maybe month but I'm not perfect, not polished, not professional - just present and getting s**t done regardless! F*** Perfection!!
27/06/2025
π Top 10 Funeral Music Choices β And Why Itβs Completely OK If Yours Sounds Different π
π Music at a funeral is powerful β it brings comfort, sparks memories, and tells the story of a life lived. Here are 10 of the most commonly chosen funeral pieces:
πΈ Time to Say Goodbye β Andrea Bocelli & Sarah Brightman
πΈ My Way β Frank Sinatra
πΈ Wind Beneath My Wings β Bette Midler
πΈ Over the Rainbow β Eva Cassidy
πΈ Hallelujah β Jeff Buckley or Leonard Cohen
πΈ Somewhere Only We Know β Keane
πΈ Supermarket Flowers β Ed Sheeran
πΈ Tears in Heaven β Eric Clapton
πΈ You Raise Me Up β Josh Groban
πΈ Fields of Gold β Sting or Eva Cassidy
π These songs are popular for a reason β theyβre beautiful and heartfelt. But hereβs what matters most: the music should feel right for your person.
πAs a celebrant, I always say: thereβs no βrightβ playlist for saying goodbye.
πΈ Was their anthem a rock ballad?
πΈ Did they sing along to Elvis, ABBA, or Eminem?
πΈ Did they love silence or birdsong more than songs?
πΈ Whether itβs classical, country, karaoke favourites, or a track no one else would ever think to choose β thatβs the one that belongs.
π Funeral ceremonies are about honouring the individual. And that includes the music that made their soul sing.
26/06/2025
π Happy Anniversary π
π To all my June couples, I hope you have had a fabulous anniversary month, thank you for keeping in touch and sharing your life with me, it has been a joy watching your relationships flourish and families grow.
π Much love ...... π
25/06/2025
π Top 10 Wedding Music Choices β And Why Itβs Absolutely Fine If Yours Sounds Different! π
π From timeless classics to chart-topping love songs, here are the top 10 popular ceremony music picks couples often go for:
πΈ Canon in D β Pachelbel π»
πΈ A Thousand Years β Christina Perri πΉ
πΈ Marry You β Bruno Mars π€
πΈ Here Comes the Sun β The Beatles βοΈ
πΈ Perfect β Ed Sheeran π
πΈ All of Me β John Legend πΉ
πΈ Somewhere Over the Rainbow β Israel KamakawiwoΚ»ole π
πΈ Canβt Help Falling in Love β Elvis Presley ποΈ
πΈ Iβm Yours β Jason Mraz πΈ
πΈ At Last β Etta James π
πAll beautiful. All meaningful. But hereβs the truth: Your wedding music doesnβt have to be on any list to be perfect.
π As a celebrant, I believe your ceremony should sound like you.
πΈ Want to walk in to a movie soundtrack, heavy metal, or your fave 90s R&B hit?
πΈ Want a live acoustic set, a saxophonist, or your mate with a Bluetooth speaker?
πΈ Want silence, birdsong, or a surprise flash mob?
Letβs make it happen.
πMusic sets the mood, tells your story, and brings the vibe β and with a celebrant, there are no rules.
24/06/2025
π Blogging Brilliant π
π I'm here, once again to remind you that I have a Blog. It's available on my website at www.shelleybell.co.uk and is, if I do say myself, something of a triumph.
π You see its not just me banging on about Weddings, its oh so much more....
πΈ Find out why I started Mourning Brew, my bereavement friendship group.
πΈ Find out what Myths exist in the Funeral Industry
πΈ Meet my Supplier Chums - this month sees Susie from Wivenhoe Flowers introduce herself and her business.
π There would have to be something wrong with you to miss it........well, what are you waiting for......get over there......
23/06/2025
π Monday Motivation - What are you waiting for? π
π A couple of weeks ago I conducted a funeral for a lady who died aged 52 - no age. Prior to that, a gentleman of 66, 2 months into the retirement he had worked all his life for. We're not promised a tomorrow so why do we feel so stuck today?
π Some people seem to always be waiting;
πΈ For signs
πΈ For approval - from family, friends, peers or all of the above.
πΈ For the time to be right.
π But what would happen if you gave up waiting and claimed the life you deserved?
π What would happen if all those dreams you ever had could become a reality?
The steps are simple;
πΈ Write down your dreams/goals - be specific clear and intentional ir two overseas holidays a year.
πΈ Why are they important - I want to learn more about the world.
πΈ What do you need to change about your life to make this happen? - have one takeaway a month and one visit to the pub a fortnight to save the Cash.
πΈ What help do you need to make these goals a reality? - a list of destinations I want to go to, agreement from the other half to reduce spending and a visual record of how much we have saved to get to the next destination complete with countdown on my phone screen.....
Think on this "Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body. But rather, to skid in broadside, in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming "Wow! What a ride!"
20/06/2025
π Say βCheese!β to Ceremony Magic π
π As an award-winning celebrant, I know that every ceremony is a story β and sometimes the best way to capture those unforgettable moments is with a well-timed selfie! π Also, in order to be able to market my services to the world I need to share a bit of myself with those of you who are looking on....
π From snapping a candid with the couple just after βI do,β to rallying the whole guest crowd for a group selfie that screams joy, selfies arenβt just fun β theyβre a fabulous way to:
πΈ Capture emotion in the moment
πΈ Create instant memories to share
πΈ Add a personal, modern touch to traditional rituals
πΈ Get everyone involved and smiling
π Whether itβs a wedding, vow renewal, or naming day, a celebrant selfie can seal the magic with laughter, love, and a whole lot of personality!
19/06/2025
π It's my Birthday!!! π
π What am I going to do to celebrate I hear you ask? Well, as its a Thursday probably not a huge amount because of it being a work day tomorrow, but I am with family on the weekend and hopefully there might be a take away and a bottle of fizz on the menu.
π I'm also spending the morning at the Town Hall at a meeting, so thats very grand, and am hoping to treat myself to a fancy cake with a candle in. I want to look as satisfied as the princess in this picture :)
π It's so weird that when I spend my entire life planning people's life events and celebrations I don't think about what to do for my own but next year is a BIG Birthday and I will have worked on some areas of personal development by then so I might have a bigger celebration for that or at least a fancy holiday :)
π Anyway, if I'm a little bit slow to respond to communications this weekend do bear with me, I'll catch up on Monday - no doubt!!
18/06/2025
π World Picnic Day π
π As it's today, it got me thinking about the type of foods we serve at celebratory events.
π As a child of the seventies I will always love a Vol au Vent and cheese & Pineapple on a stick, especially when served from half a grapefruit covered in tin foil so it looks like a hedgehog!!
π Traditionally evening do's and wakes are usually a resplendant Beige Buffet of sausage rolls, scotch eggs and pork pies. The only greenery you see are a few croudite and dips because you know, there might be vegetarians!!
π The trend for grazing boards fit into the realm of picnics but I always worry about cold chain and how long those slices of ham have been sat on that decorative log for, and where are the fly covers??
π Having picnic baskets per each table at a wedding or a wake is essentially an afternoon tea on fancy packaging but the ceremony of opening the parcels and sharing the contents gets people connected. And from a pricing point of view it is so easy to control with little waste.
π My favourite for a wedding breakfast, without doubt are sharing platters that are brought out to your table and the guests help themselves. Bowls of salad, hot meats or veggie dishes with suitable accompaniements and plenty of big spoons, get people talking to each other and sharing in a dialogue about what they are beong presented with and this can lead who knows where. It's so much more socialble than tables of couples remaining tables of couples and not engaging with other guests as plates are set down in front of them.
I don't think I'll ever get over the delicious Porchetta at the wedding of and - ohmnomnomnom π
π So, if you are planning a life event/celebration consider your catering options, include a little retro vibe along with some modern elements and don't forget those with dietary requirements (they can have their own picnic basket Booboo!!)
17/06/2025
π Three Counties Crematorium Open Day π
π I am thrilled to have been invited to attend Three Counties Crematorium in Braintree on Saturday July 5th for their Open Day.
I've done plenty of wedding open days but this is my first crematorium one.
π As an advocate for those at end of life or in receipt of a life limiting diagnosis I am pleased to be able to talk to people about what a welcoming environment Three Counties is. The staff are all lovely and they will be conducting behind the scenes tours on the day to really demystify the whole process around cremations.
There will also be some funeral services and directors on hand to answer questions and refreshements available too.
π So come along, have a look around the beautiful grounds and the facilities, have your questions answered and then let's build a plan for your funeral, if you wish, so that you can get on with living knowing that you'll be looked after in death.
16/06/2025
π Monday Motivation - The Curse of Overthinking π
π You know how social media seems to listen to what you are talking about and then fill your feed full of ads about holidays, cars, wallpaper or whatever your conversation is about. I made the mistake of talking about having a full mind the other day and then the next day I am being plagues with ads about what vitamins and supplements I need to reduce menopause induced brain fog and ads asking me if I know what burnout is and could I have it? I dunno, I am pretty tired and because now I'm wondering that all the time and its keeping me awake I'm even more tired....?
π Overthinking is sneaky. And I am a chronic overthinker!!
It justifies itself as a problem solving tool - but I can't solve a problem that happened twenty years ago in a company I no longer work in or for someone I haven't seen for 15 years!!
It's ok, I'm just building awareness or problem solving in case history repeats itself - it won't!! Or at least we can't know it is until it gets here so why am I expending all this energy on it??
π The difference is that problem solving helps us to move forward and overthinking causes us to feel stuck. So what do you do? Ask yourself;
πΈ Have I stopped progressing with this thought, project, or plan?
πΈ Have I already thought this out enough to now be able to act?
πΈ Will I do any harm if I act now and review again later?
π So, I've decided I'm not burned out, I'm just tired, so I went for a bath and had an early night - problem solved!!
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How Can I Help You?
My Independent Family Celebrant services provide beautifully tailored and unique Wedding Ceremonies, Vow Renewals, Naming Ceremonies and sensitive Funeral Ceremonies across Essex and East Anglia. Your ceremony is equally important to me as it is to you, so I take the time to find out who you are and pay special attention to what is truly important to you, as well as how you want the ceremony to look and feel.
Say goodbye to someone in a style that truly reflected them or usher in the future with a new spouse or welcome a child into the family in a ceremony full of joy and inspiration, there are no limits to what your ceremony can be.
With abundant choices and a multitude of elements to choose from in your ceremony it can be everything you imagined, with no restriction on location, licenses or legal requirements that are prevalent in civil ceremonies.
Whether you have a religious belief or prefer to incorporate other traditions, I have something for everyone and respect your personal spirituality and beliefs.
If you would like more information about the services on offer, or to book an appointment please contact me.
