Tonight @superstitionatx ! Doors at 5:00pm, 🎟️ in BIO.
🥊 TICKETS AVAILABLE IN BIO
🥋 21+
🤼♂️ UFC WATCH PARTY 9PM
Will MOLLY TABLE murder someone @superstitionatx FIGHT NIGHT? Your guess is as good as @dadbod_owns , but probably more informed!
Join @slamportal on SATURDAY, 6/29 when we turn a NIGHT CLUB into a FIGHT CLUB. Hell Right!
#prowrestling #professionalwrestling #austinprowrestling#texasprowrestling #austinthingstodo #austintexasthings#austintexas #austintx #slamportal #superstitionatx#austinbars #austinnightlife #austincocktails #atxbars#atxnightlife #austinclubs #austinevents #atx #austin #ufc#ufcfightnight #ufcwatchparty #fightnight #cockrocker #cockrockerwrestler
LUCHA TRES TONIGHT! @drinkbluenorther
What began as a speech of DADBOD’S disdain for people who believe in SANTA evolved into an all out FALLS COUNT ANYWHERE MATCH with SANTA CHIVA at LUCHA LIBRE DOS! After taking a grueling beating all over the BLUE NORTHER premises that included being hit with a delicious can of ranch water as well as a Christmas tree (!), SANTA CHIVA dug deep and finished DADBOD with a running shoulder tackle.
Ergo, SANTA proved that he is indeed real; and the magic of Christmas is sometimes harnessed in the power of a cold steel chair. YOUCH!
📚 @derekrefbeard
🐐 @santachiva
👴 @dadbod_owns
🌵 @drinkbluenorther
🎥 @dizzynek0
#wrestling #prowrestling #professionalwrestling #austinwrestling #austintexas #austinthingstodo #slamportal #bluenorther #ranchwater #dadbod #dadbodowns #dadbodwrestler #santachiva #santachivapro #santa #santaclaus #christmas
Available in bio. Don’t miss out on this great deal with an OPEN BAR! Tickets will go fast!💨
🎄 🐺 HAPPY HOLIDAYS, SPACE WOLVES! 🐺 🎅
Hold your loved ones close and spread the magic (or “a-science” in some cultures) of the season to all those around you. For you never know when the wave of political economy that is Big Daddy Bolero & ASSOCIATES is going to come crashing down on you and the CANDY CANE industry.
The house always wins… SAD!
📚 Derek Taylor
🌵 Blue Norther Hard Seltzer
🎥 @dizzynek0
#wrestling #prowrestling #professionalwrestling #austinwrestling #austintexas #austinthingstodo #slamportal #bluenorther #ranchwater #ddb #bigdaddybolero #dic #dadsincharge #candycane #candycanes #christmas
🎄 WHOA! This kind of GOAT out of hand. 🎅What began as a speech of DADBOD’S disdain for people who believe in SANTA evolved into an all out FALLS COUNT ANYWHERE MATCH with SANTA CHIVA at LUCHA LIBRE DOS! After taking a grueling beating all over the BLUE NORTHER premises that included being hit with a delicious can of ranch water as well as a Christmas tree (!), SANTA CHIVA dug deep and finished DADBOD with a running shoulder tackle. Ergo, SANTA proved that he is indeed real; and the magic of Christmas is sometimes harnessed in the power of a cold steel chair. YOUCH! 📚 @derekrefbeard🐐 Santa Chiva👴 DADBOD 🌵 Blue Norther Hard Seltzer🎥 @dizzynek0#wrestling #prowrestling #professionalwrestling #austinwrestling #austintexas #austinthingstodo #slamportal #bluenorther #ranchwater #dadbod #dadbodowns #dadbodwrestler #santachiva #santachivapro #santa #santaclaus #christmas
“SHUT UP, YOU FAT TURDS!” It was a battle of buttons.
SLAM PORTAL’s return to Blue Norther Hard Seltzer for LUCHA LIBRE DOS! began with a BIG BANG as owner Austin Pittman activated the INTER-DIMENSIONAL GATEWAY once again for none other than Luigi Primo The best a pizza making wrestler entered the ranch water domicile with one objective… to guide us through INTERGALACTIC COMBAT!
Unfortunately, MEGA-WOLF-MODE CHAMPION Plüto Mars interrupted Luigi before matches could take place with an eerie foreshadowing of events to come later in the MAIN EVENT.
We are very happy to report that since the ON SWITCH installation on the portal, no blood sacrifice was made to activate it this time. VERY AWESOME and OSHA COMPLIANT!
🎥 @dizzynek0
#wrestling #prowrestling #professionalwrestling #austinwrestling #austintexas #austinthingstodo #slamportal #luigiprimo #pizza #plutomars #bluenorther #ranchwater #buttons
MORE BOD ON GOAT ACTION?!?! DAD ON DAD FIGHTING?!? Yes, in fact it’s what we SPECIALIZE in at SLAM PORTAL.
It goes like THIS:
DIVORCEBOD made his SLAM PORTAL debut while simultaneously accepting an award for saddest country song ever. Oh yeah, DIVORCEBOD is a country singer now. Jesus, keep up.
During his acceptance speech for the song everyone knows, he explained that the inspiration for his hit was the fact that his wife left him for a GOAT!
As we were all putting the pieces together regarding what seems like DIVORCEBOD’s apt 7th divorce, SANTA CHIVA burst through the portal to demand royalties for a song that was apparently about him. Well, this is awkward!
There was a little back forth, and then wrestling happened. A match that seemed to span the entirety of the CENTRAL MACHINE WORKS BEER GARDEN was finalized by a DIVORCEBOD victory via the ALIMONY CLAUSE. WOW!
For the sake of everything, someone find us some MOMS somewhere to clear all this up!
#slamportal #comedywrestling #comedy #wrestling #prowrestling #austin #atx #divorcebod #jamieholley #jamisonholley #santachiva #santachivapro #countrymusic #texas
Help us solve the mystery of the masked singer Saturday, Match 18th at Central Machine Works!#slamportal #comedywrestling #comedy #wrestling #prowrestling #austin #atx #luigiprimo #maskedsinger #catdaddy
Hello HÜMANS!
Plüto landed in the atmosphere HOT at SLAM PORTAL III: “BELT IT OUT!” after CHUCK STEAK requested that our host beckon an alien he could hunt and smoke. I guess you had to be there 🤷
Unfortunately, an injury restricted our time with Plüto at the event; and Chuck was quick to take advantage of the situation. We at SLAM PORTAL are confident that Eltarian space doctors are working on Plüto with the latest nano technology and wish him a warp drive recovery! His eventual return to SLAM PORTAL will be a momentous occasion!
#slamportal #comedywrestling #comedy #wrestling #prowrestling #austin #atx #plutomars
Hello HÜMANS!
PLÜTO MARS came in HOT at SLAM PORTAL III: “BELT IT OUT!” after CHUCK STEAK requested that our host beckon an alien he could hunt and smoke. I guess you had to be there 🤷
Unfortunately, an injury restricted our time with Pluto at the event. We at SLAM PORTAL are confident that Eltarian space doctors are working on PLÜTO with the latest nano technology and wish him a warp drive recovery!
Central Machine Works Austin
#slamportal #comedywrestling #comedy #wrestling #prowrestling #austin #atx #plutomars
SHIMMY OVER TO CENTRAL MACHINE WORKS 4PM SATURDAY, JAN 21ST FOR A FREE COMEDY WRESTLING SHOW-
SLAM PORTAL III: “BELT IT OUT!”
#slamportal #comedywrestling #comedy #wrestling #prowrestling #austin #atx #dic #dadsincharge #dadbod #dadbodwrestler #bestdad #bodzilla #megantheestallion
Pugginhead says check out our new website! #slamportal #comedywrestling #comedy #wrestling #prowrestling #austin #austintexas #texas #texaswrestling #atx #puggywrestler #pugginhead #chubbyunclejuan #puggy #realboy
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