Marriage Officiant Apostle C.G.Callender

02/01/2025

Daily Affirmations for Empowerment

1. I am strong and I know my worth. I trust myself and my abilities.

2. I am not my past mistakes, and I am definitely not an accident. I am a unique, purposeful individual.

3. I was born a winner. Despite challenges and shortcomings, I remain victorious.

4. God loves me, and He has a plan for my life. I trust in His goodness and guidance.

5. My present circumstances are not my destination or the final chapter of my life. I am in transition to something better.

6. I will make it in life, no matter what comes my way. I am resilient and determined.

7. I am victorious, and God made me unique. I celebrate my individuality and strengths.

Repeating these affirmations daily can help rewire your mind with positive thoughts, boost confidence, and align you with your purpose. Speak them with conviction and feel the empowerment!

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25/12/2024

26/11/2024

24/11/2024

𝗕𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝗿𝗶𝗮𝗴𝗲 𝗔𝗱𝘃𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿...✍️
1. Choose to love each other, even in those moments when you struggle to like each other. Love is a commitment, not a feeling.

2. Always answer the phone when your husband/wife is calling. When possible, try to keep your phone off when you're together with your spouse.

3. Make time together a priority. Budget for a consistent date night. Time is the "currency of relationships," so consistently invest time into your marriage.

4. Surround yourself with friends who will strengthen your marriage. Remove yourself from people who may tempt you to compromise your character.

5. Make laughter the soundtrack of your marriage. Share moments of joy. And even in the hard times, find reasons to laugh.

6. In every argument, remember that there won't be a "winner" and a "loser." You're partners in everything so you'll either win together or lose together. Work together to find a solution.

7. Realize that a strong marriage rarely has two strong people at the same time. It's usually a husband and wife taking turns being strong for each other in the moments when the other feels weak.

8. Prioritize what happens in the bedroom. It takes more than s*x to build a strong marriage, but it's nearly impossible to build a strong marriage without it.

9. Remember that marriage isn't 50/50— divorce is 50/50. Marriage has to be 100/100. It's not splitting everything in half, but both partners giving everything they've got.

10. Give your best to each other, not your leftovers after you've given your best to everyone else.

11. Learn from other people, but don't feel the need to compare your life or your marriage to anyone else's. God's plan for your life is masterfully unique.

12. Don't put your marriage on hold while you're raising your kids or else you'll end up with an empty nest and an empty marriage.

13. Never keep secrets from each other. Secrecy is the enemy of intimacy.

14. Never lie to each other. Lies break trust and trust is the foundation of a strong marriage.

15. When you've made a mistake, admit it and humbly seek forgiveness. You should be quick to say, "I was wrong. I'm sorry. Please forgive me."

16. When your husband/wife breaks your trust, give them your forgiveness instantly. This will promote healing and create the opportunity for trust to be rebuilt. You should be quick to say, "I love you. I forgive you. Let's move forward."

17. Be patient with each other. Your spouse is always more important than your schedule.

18. Model the kind of marriage that will make your sons want to grow up to be good husbands, and your daughters want to grow up to be good wives.

19. Be your spouse's biggest encourager, not his/her biggest critic. Be the one who wipes away their tears, not the one who causes them.

20. Never talk badly about your spouse to other people or vent about them online. Protect your spouse at all times and in all places.

21. Always wear your wedding ring. It will remind you that you're always connected to your spouse and will remind the rest of the world that you're off-limits.

22. When you have to choose between saying nothing or saying something mean to your spouse, say nothing every time.

23. Never consider divorce as an option. Remember that a "perfect marriage" is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.

10/08/2024

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10/08/2024

This is exactly how marriage works.

Two of you must remain a work in progress, each looking out for the other.

To truly become one, both parties must be ready to clip off some excesses, fill up some gaps and make amends as much as possible.

It's an error to think that marriage is a ready to eat meal for you, no no, it's an empty pot, you both get the ingredients and start preparing your meal.

What you prepare is what you eat.

Meaning there is no existing sweetness in marriage, you both create it.

Don't get married because you are seeking happiness, marriage won't give you happiness if you ain't happy on your own.

Marriage won't give you peace if you don't have peace in you.

Marriage won't give you joy if you don't have joy in peace.

What you come into the marriage with, is what you will get.

Oh how sweet, when couples look out for each other, when they both allow themselves to work on each other.

09/08/2024

HOW TO BE A ROMANTIC WIFE

1. Remember that romance is not the husband's responsibility alone

2. Compliment your husband when he is well-dressed and smells good

3. Touch your husband's thigh when he is driving or seated next to you when you want to tell him something

4. Flirt with him over the phone

5. Play with his fingers when you two are having pillow talks

6. Cuddle with him and place his head on your bosom when you two are in bed

7. Place your hand on his arm as a Queen who knows her position

8. Dress up for his visual stimulation, especially in the bedroom

9. Dance for him and tease him

10. Tell him all the passionate things you want to do to him

11. Praise his s*xual performance and the things he does that give you pleasure. Tell him how how he drives you crazy

12. Take him out on dates, don't always wait for him to plan things

13. Kiss him, not just on the lips but also his cheeks, his forehead, his fingers

14. Offer to serve him with a smile and take care of him

15. Call him special names "My King", "Darling", "Honey"

16. Be confident in being yourself, do great things as an individual. It excites him when he is proud of you

17. Talk highly about him in public, encourage him in private when he is down

18. Find out his favourite s*x position and do it to him often

19. Help him to put on and remove his clothes, his tie, his coat

20. Rally the children in appreciating him, make him feel valued at home regardless of his financial status

21. Buy him gifts that he will like

22. Prepare his favourite meal or ask him what he would like to eat

23. Tell him you love him. Men love to be affirmed too. Tell him also what you love about him

24. Ask him how his day has been. Show care

25. Make s*xual moves on him, don't just lay there waiting for him to do all the work

26. Pray for him to bless him, not because you think he is the devil or the problem in your marriage. Prayerful women are romantic

27. Attend to his needs without him asking such as making him a cup of tea/coffee when he is working

Just because you have spent years together doesn't mean you stop making him feel special. You were attractive and made him feel valued and that is why he pursued you to get you, stay attractive and valuing him to keep him; as you do so, he will long for your presence and give you his best. The woman who loves her husband, builds her home

07/08/2024

6 THINGS YOU SHOULD PAY ATTENTION TO BEFORE YOU COMMIT TO SOMEONE FOR MARRIAGE

1. HOW THEY HANDLE CORRECTION.

Marriage will require a lot of learning, unlearning and relearning. If the person is not teachable, marriage will be a challenge.

2. HOW THEY ACT WHEN THEY DON'T GET WHAT THEY WANT.

If someone cannot handle disappointments, or they always want things to go their way, that will be a difficult spouse. Take for instance: When a woman starts biIIing you like she’s after your Iife, giving you deadlines to do things for her or the relationship is over, that’s not Iove, that’s enough signs that you’re being usεd. Dυmp her!!!

3. HOW THEY ACT AROUND THE OPPOSITE GENDER.

They are in a relationship but act and behave like they are single and ready to mingle. No boundaries with the opposite s*x. Someone who gets overly excited around the opposite gender sometimes to the point of forgetting you even exist or wants to entertain and please others, will bring you unnecessary trouble and make you insecure.

4. HOW THEY ACT WHEN ANGRY.

Anger is a normal human emotion, but how you control it or how it controls you will determine if you're ready for marriage or you need serious help. Does the person become insulting, violent, threatening and rude when angry; or do they control their temper? Marriage will bring some reasons to be angry here and there; can they handle it?

5. HOW THEY ACT WHEN THE CONVERSATION IS ABOUT S*X.

If they get uncomfortable when the conversation is about s*x or they get overly lustful; your marriage will have trouble. Marriage should be with someone open minded about s*x conversations and also someone who sees it as something special in marriage.

6. HOW THEY ACT WHEN THE CONVERSATION IS NOT ABOUT S*X.

Does the person tune off or show no interest when you talk about other topics? That person is only interested in s*x, not a long term bond with you. Be careful!

08/07/2024

MARRIAGE is a UNION of TWO GOOD FORGIVERS. If you can't FORGIVE, please MARRIAGE is not for you, enjoy your SINGLE life in peace.

MARRIAGE is a MINISTRY of all OFFENSES, so you must be a PERMANENT SECRETARY in FORGIVENESS DEPARTMENT, with a PHD in UNDERSTANDING, MSC in LOVING and BSC in TOLERANCE.

Furthermore, you should be able to RELATE well with the MINISTRY of FINANCE and ECONOMIC DEVELOPMENT otherwise you will run a POVERTY and BITTER INSTITUTION.

01/07/2024

I read this somewhere and decided to share it here.

"A DIVORCED SINGLE MOTHER WROTE"

I am writing to you in order to make someone understand that it's good to appreciate our partners despite their flaws.

I am 32 years of age.

My ex husband and I dated for 6 years.

We were best of friends.

I waited until he completed college and started work.

My family and his family then met.

We got married and had a son. [7 years old now].

My husband was short tempered at times but our problems started when I wanted to make him feel he couldn't control me.

Every time we argued, I would pack my bags, go to my family and explain.

My sisters would phone my husband and shout at him.

If he was controlling me I would always dare him that if he wished, he could divorce me.

I never wanted divorce.

I just had pride and I never wanted to look like a loose woman in his eyes.

One day I pushed him so hard that for the first time he beat me and locked me outside.

I went to my family, my family took him to the police, every time I looked like I was being abused!

But to be honest, I used to abuse my husband emotionally.

He was arrested and detained.

I was asked by his family to withdraw the case.

I felt that what I was doing was wrong.

My husband was never a violent man, he did what he did because I pushed him to the wall of which he openly knelt down and apologized.

I withdrew the charge, and we reconciled.

After three months, I packed my bags after a small issue and he remained alone.

After two days, I
received a call that he was in the hospital.

My family told me that I shouldn't go there because it would look like I was begging him and my sisters believed he was feigning the illness.

All this time, people felt sorry for me like I was the one being abused.

He spent a week in the hospital, after he came out, I just received a divorce summon.

I wanted to say no to divorce, but because I felt this pride, I wanted him to change his mind and beg me.

I called him and said he would get the divorce because I lived like I was in hell.

When we went to court, I wanted to make him pay, so I told the court that I needed his properties to be shared.

To my surprise he openly told the court that whatever he and I acquired together should be given to me, all he wanted was divorce.

We were divorced in 2009 July.

Now, my husband is married, whilst l am here wasted!

My family members are gossiping about me.

I depend on what my ex husband gives to my son for survival.

I know I wasted my
marriage.

I am here telling all wives that they should be careful how they get advise.

Don't be cheated, don't entertain family interference in your marriage my dear reader.

Even my young sisters are much more respected than me.

Those who encouraged me to get divorced are always teasing and bad mouthing me.

Please ladies, be vigilant in your marriage.

Thought it wise to share my story to save your marriage.

There is no benefit in pride for nothing.

SOMETIMES IT'S NOT THE MAN'S FAULT AT ALL,
IT'S YOUR PRIDE, AND THE PEOPLE YOU ALLOWED TO ADVISE YOU,
SO BE WISE AND VIGILANT IN YOUR MARRIAGE. 👍🏻👈🏻

May Almighty protect us from evil, evildoers, from those who do evil.

26/06/2024

KILLERS OF MARRIAGE

1 Laziness kills Marriage

2 Suspicion kills Marriage

3 Lack of trust kills marriage

4 Lack of mutual respect kills marriage

5 Unforgiveness, Bitterness, Hatred, Malice and anger kill marriage

6 Unnecessary Arguments kills marriage

7 Keeping Secrets from your Spouse kills marriage

8 Every form of Infidelity kills marriage (financial, emotional, psychological, material, etc)

9 Poor Communication kills marriage

10 Lies easily kills marriage, be sincere to your spouse in every aspect.

11 Relating more with your parents/family members than your spouse kills marriage

12 Lack of, inadequate or unenjoyable s*x kills marriage.

13 Nagging kills marriage

14 Too much talk and careless talk kills marriage

15 Spending less or little time with your spouse kills marriage

16 Being too independent minded kills marriage

17 LOVE for party, money, impulse buying and spending/partying, financial indiscipline kill marriage

18 Exposing the inadequacies of your spouse to your parents or Siblings kills marriage

19 Not being steadfast/fervent in the spirit, not praying together kills not only marriage but your life

20 Spurning correction and reprimand kills marriage.

21 Always wearing a sad face and being Moody kills marriage.

22 FEMINISM ADVOCACY kills marriage.

23 MALE CHAUVINISM kills marriage

24 Uncontrolled or hot Temperament, Anger kills marriage.

25 Not understanding your role and position , not taking responsibilty in marriage as instituted by God kills marriage.

26 Not being sensitive to the spiritual, emotional, financial and physical needs of your spouse kills marriage

27 When anything threatens the position/security of a wife, her reaction(s) will be detrimental to her marriage.

28 Lack of the Knowledge of & Obedience to the word of God kills marriage.

17/05/2024

WHAT IS LOVE?

Love is not enough for a successful marriage. Love can be deceiving and may not be a reliable qualification for marriage. Love may bring happiness, but it does not necessarily provide the tools and skills needed to make a marriage work.

A successful marriage requires knowledge and understanding about how to live and commit to your partner. Understanding how to navigate the challenges of a committed relationship is a crucial element for a lasting and fulfilling partnership.

Love can make us believe that we can overcome any obstacles in a relationship. However, the reality is that many divorced individuals were once deeply in love with their partners. This challenges the notion that love is what keeps a marriage together. Love alone does not guarantee success in marriage. While love brings happiness, it lacks the necessary ingredients to sustain a marriage. Knowledge is what truly makes a marriage work.

Many people enter into marriage solely based on their feelings of love, without considering the practical aspects and challenges of living with someone. Our culture places a strong emphasis on emotions, leading us to make impulsive commitments without considering the practical aspects of a long-term commitment.

To protect and sustain a marriage, individuals need to acquire knowledge about how to navigate the complexities of a long-term commitment. This knowledge may include understanding effective communication, conflict resolution, compromise, and the ability to adapt to change. By possessing this knowledge, individuals can better equip themselves to build and maintain a successful marriage.

In conclusion, love is not the sole determinant of a successful marriage. Instead, knowledge about how to navigate the complexities of a committed relationship is crucial for a lasting and fulfilling partnership.

23/03/2024

FACTS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT YOUR MAN’S S*X LIFE:

Most of the time, you complain that your husband’s demand for s*x is too frequent. You feel his crave for s*x is similar to his need for food and you can’t help but wonder if s*x is the only thing he thinks about. Men and women in the areas of s*x are wired differently. With these variations in mind, all you need to do is to know how men see s*x and understand how to relate with your own man.

S*x is one thing husbands would ask more of. Almost all husbands wish their wives can step up their s*xual abilities and give them more at “bed time”. Your husband’s case is not different. Ask him and you will be surprised he is likely to be among the 92% of men who say they want more of s*x.

– S*x of yesterday is for yesterday. While you are still enjoying the fulfillment of yesterday’s s*x, your “lover boy” is already thinking of how to get another one. Remember, every man has a s*x drive that is stronger than the average woman.

– A man’s s*x drive is one of his strongest drives. You need to know that only a few things matter to a man than his s*x life and the s*x drive is stronger than any other “drive” in his body. This is the reason nothing really matters to most men whenever they want s*x.

– Every man wants his wife to be romantic and involved in bed. No man will love to have a “bedroom failure” as a wife. No matter how religious they are, they want romantic, exciting and tantalizing wives.

– He needs routine s*xual gratification the same way his wife needs routine acts of love, care and kindness. Just as you want him to be kind to you; he also wants you to be available in bed at least 2 or 3 times a week. Crises arise when the wife wants the act of kindness before s*x and the man wants s*xual gratification before an act of kindness. My word for you wife is; break the cycle. Give him s*x, and see if he won’t show you more love and care.

– Virtually every man experiences arousal, attraction and temptation seven times a day. Let him fall into your hands, not into the hands of a strange woman. Help him manage his s*xuality.

– Men are moved by what they see. Let your husband be attracted to you. Never allow his secretary to take your position; dress nicely. If you are alone in the house put on skimpy dresses, s*xy underwears; let him be moved towards you. Dress up in front of him. Make it “The-more-you-look-the-more-you-see” affair. Dress slowly to the extent that he will notice you. You are in your palace, “you own your husband.

– Wants the wife to be actively involved in s*x. Almost 90% of men said they will be more motivated if their wives can get involved in the bedroom. They said unanimously that they hate “dry and drab” women in their bedrooms.
Your man wants you to be involved during foreplay and love making. He wants you to roll your body, turn, raise your laps, roll your buttocks, hold him, put your breast in his mouth, moan, talk, gibber and show that you are really enjoying him. Make him feel like a real man.

– Men are more aroused when their wives seduce them. Most men enjoy s*xual invitations. Surprise your man by inviting him; become the “seducer” and see how happy he will be. Don’t be ashamed to flirt with your husband; be his mistress, his concubine.

– More than 70% of men want s*x at least 2 or 3 times a week, while more than 60% of women want s*x 2 or 3 times a month. This is where wisdom comes in for you as a woman. If you must keep your man, protect your home and send strange women far from your husband, then you must learn how to improve your bedroom performance. Be among the 40 % of women who are enjoying better relationships with their husbands to.

Don't forget my aim and purpose it make sure homes and family union are brought together once again. Join me by putting everything you have learnt to practice.

20/03/2024

HOW TO CORRECT YOUR SPOUSE

1. Do not correct your spouse in public. It makes him or her feel embarrassed

2. Do not shout at your spouse when correcting

3. Do not use words like "You never...", "You always...". Doing so is an unfair exaggeration. Say "I don't think it was proper what you did yesterday"

4. Do not correct your spouse as if he/she is a child saying "Please act your age", "Grow up", "You're so childish". This doesn't show respect

5. Do not correct your spouse about something serious when you two don't have ample time to talk about it. Do it in a relaxed atmosphere

6. As you correct your spouse speak with a loving tone

7. Do not correct your spouse in front of your children. It shows disrespect

8. Don't compare your spouse with others saying "Why can't you be like other women/men?", "Why can't you be like so and so?". It undermines your spouse and kills self confidence

9. Don't bring up your spouse's mistakes of the past. It only compounds issues

10. Praise your spouse more than you give criticism

11. As you correct your spouse, don't let your spouse doubt your love. You can do this by saying "You know I love you. Sweetheart, I noticed that...."

12. Do not let your feelings get the best of you and say irrational things

13. Expect a push back from your spouse or a justification, most adults don't take correction lightly but if you remain gentle, eventually you're spouse will be receptive

14. Once you've corrected your spouse, don't police him/her; this will only demoralize your spouse's efforts

15. Appreciate your spouse's growth

16. Don't take life too seriously

17. Remember that the purpose of correcting your spouse is not to prove you're right but to inspire your spouse to be better. When you focus on proving you are right, you might win the argument but lose your marriage or make things difficult between you two
____________________________

14/02/2024

Top 7 keys from the book "The Seven Rings of Marriage: Your Model for a Lasting and Fulfilling Marriage" by Jackie Bledsoe.

The book outlines seven distinct stages, or "rings," that couples typically navigate throughout their marriage. Each ring presents unique challenges and opportunities for growth, ultimately leading to a stronger, more fulfilling partnership.

1. The Engagement Ring: This stage focuses on the initial excitement and planning leading up to the wedding. It's important to establish healthy communication, set realistic expectations, and lay the groundwork for a strong foundation.

2. The Wedding Ring: The wedding day itself symbolizes the official start of the marriage journey. It's crucial to celebrate and cherish this momentous occasion while keeping the focus on the long-term commitment and partnership that lies ahead.

3. The DiscoveRing: This stage is about getting to know each other on a deeper level, beyond the initial romantic spark. It involves exploring each other's personalities, habits, and needs, while learning to navigate differences and build intimacy.

4. The PerseveRing: Challenges and conflicts are inevitable in any relationship. This stage emphasizes the importance of perseverance, open communication, and conflict resolution skills to overcome obstacles and strengthen the bond.

5. The RestoRING: Life transitions, external factors, or simply time can sometimes lead to a sense of stagnation or disconnection in a marriage. This stage encourages couples to reignite the spark, rediscover their individual and shared passions, and reignite the joy and romance in their relationship.

6. The ProspereRING: This stage is about looking towards the future and setting shared goals for the years ahead. It involves financial planning, career aspirations, family planning, and ensuring both partners feel secure and supported in their individual and joint endeavors.

7. The MentoRING: As couples grow older, they can offer invaluable wisdom and support to younger generations. This stage encourages them to share their experiences, mentor others, and leave a lasting legacy of love and commitment.

12/02/2024

Four pillars of love
1. Compassion
2. Commitment
3. Pleasure
4. Sacrifice

04/02/2024

HOW TO GIVE YOUR WOMAN A HEART FELT LOVE...

At times we men are accused of not loving by our women but the truth. Many a men love their women but lack means to express and outlet that love.

Men are creatures of love naturally hence God even said "husband love your wives". In history we record men dying for love since its their nature to give in love but at times we fail to show that love.

1) Presence;

If you trully love your woman be present in her life. Show up in time of need and pain even joy and happiness. Lack of presence of men on women's life rises concern of care and support. Just be present; be available.

2) Passion;

If you trully love your woman then show some passion about her; not just interest like you just like her. Be passionate about her life progress; state of affairs; in your conversations; your physical affection. Passion simply means be lively and stop behaving like you are forced to he with her.

3) Publicity;

If you want to show how much you love your women then embrace her publicly, let your world see her; post her pics on Facebook; set them as status; use her as screen saver; walk with her in open public spaces. Women feel more appreciated when they are not hidden.

4) Partnership;

If you want her to see your love then allow her to be your partner. Create an inter-dependence relationship with her. Even if you know you can do somethings but ask her and allow her to do somethings for you. Allow her to choose some clothes for you; decide your life to an extent; determine this and that. Give her that power in your life for her to feel needed and useful.

5) Privacy;

Every man loves his privacy so much, but that privacy destroys intimacy with women. It's best you open your world a little bit for her to see into it. Let her know your source of income; your past life; your nicknames; your life before her; your this and that few you call private.

6) Promotion;

Any man who claims to love any woman must dare to promote her to a level of a wife or even certain amount of commitment towards her. Your love cannot be seen by your woman if you still have her at the bottom of your life like footnote reference in a paragraph. If you love it put a ring on it (I will write more on it).

7) Power;

At times women fight for power that they fight for anything. Women feel less loved especially when they have no power in the relationship. Give her power to decide some set ups of your life. It's clear that your love can be hidden and held back by power struggle. Give your woman some power to see how much you love her abd trust her with that power.

8 Pampering;

One of the things men fail to keep up with is the idea of pampering their women. Women see no love when they are not given things they love and enjoy for their pleasure. Women can be pampered differently depending what is their preference according to their love language (5 Love Languages by Dr Gary Chapman). Find a way to pamper your woman. Get to know how to spoil her rotten.

9) Prayer;

Our love has to be based on activity beyond physical more. Our spiritual journey has to build and grow our love. Men must introduce and facilitate his woman to his spiritual journey. Our women feel less loved because all they see is the physical molecule impediment of love which can be both ways than inner spiritual intimacy that creates companionship in life.