07/07/2022
This is my first rewrite of this little prose. When I get it fixed to say what I want to say, I think I would like to make a video of it.
"We Were Friends"
It wasn't long ago, when we called each other best friends. As I now reflect for a moment on the past,
looking back through the years, I can't help but wonder what happened to us? We were as close as sisters
And now when I see you it's like looking at someone I never knew.
Tonight, you may be looking up at me, as I stand alone in the center of this arena, lit up in a spotlight.
You see no matter how high how I rise in our sport, I will never look down on anyone, especially you, because
regardless of how you feel about me, I will always call you my friend.
You see, I still remember, when we were just small girl growing in a small rural town. We became good friends
when were both discovered that we both loved horses. Our parents coudln't keep us seperated. I remember that
we both got ponies that year and we would spend hours outside riding them in the pastures.
It was only a year later that we were hanging out in early December watching the National Finals Rodeo. It was
right then, watching those women ride their horses around them barrels, that we both decided that was the dream
we both wanted to shoot for. I'm going to tell you the truth, I never really thought I would ever it make it, I
just wanted to do it because I had a friend like you to chase that dream with.
We got us a trainer, well our dad's did, a older lady who taught us the cloverleaf pattern we would run. How to turn
our horses smooth around the barrel. We learned at different paces, I was much slower than you. You seemed to be
a natural as you quickly picked up on the things we were taught. It was okay that I wasn't as good, I was still
happy for you.
It was sometime that summer that we both worked up the nerve and signed up to ride in our first barrel race. I
did it for the love of spending time with both my horse and you. You got to where you would even win the little
britches class some days. I was always last but it didn't hurt none because you would always be there rooting me on and
telling me to keep working and I would get better. That was all the encouragement I needed to keep going.
Eventually, you got so good that you were ready to move up to a bigger horse. I knew I wasn't ready so I kept
riding my pony. This is when you made friends with other barrel racing girls. Ya'll all set high above me
on my little pony. You made friends with those girls but I didn't care, we were best friends and I knew you
would always be there for me.
I don't know what changed in you then but I started to feel you had less time for me. When I came around you
with your new friends, I heard the giggles, felt the laughter behind my back, just because I wouldn't move on
to a bigger horse. I didn't care, was what I told myself, but it did hurt me. "You were my best friend,"
I reminded myself, "and really didnt mean the things I heard you all say about me."
It didn't take you long to make the climb to where you were running with the best racers in the area, frequently,
making it in the 1D. Girl, the distance between you and I was so great that I was nothing but a dot in your eye. But
I was still there, giving it all I had, working hard to get better. Reaching for that goal of eternal glory. I finally
felt I was ready for a big horse, yet, I was still at the bottom of the 5D. I guess, if I was as good as you were,
I too would have found other friends instead of spending all my time with me.
Barrel racing was a expense I was willing to pay. I wasn't winning any money still I felt it was important for me
to be there every weekend, trying to get better. I only kept going because it was the only place I got to see you
then.
It was the year we turned fifteen you got your rodeo card. I was still running in little local horse shows and
didn't have any money to show for all the work I had put in. The nights you ran in the rodeo, I always showed
up to root for you. You had a rough beginning but you soon got it worked out and I'm proud to say that I was there
the night you won your first rodeo. I was your best friend, and I wouldn't have missed it for the world. "You go girl,"
Is what I said to you. I could see that you didn't even hear me as you turned to hug your other friends.
This was another moment that revealed to me how great the distance was between you and I. It was a horse race, I was
four laps down and falling back. You never had time for me anymore either. You were not there telling me to "Keep
working hard and I'll get better." The only person to push me harder was myself. When we did see each other, I
could feel that cold shoulder that you would turn toward me. We rarely talked anymore. The laughter had long gone
silent. You didn't have time for someone that rarely placed in the 3D.
You won golden buckles, lether saddles, and lots of money. You were at the top of the leader board consistently. All
I ever got for my hard work was big tears and a lot of dissapointment. The worse part of it all was I kmew I no longer
had a friend. You don't think things were not hard for me. You don't think I didn't consider quitting, hanging up
on my dream? Of course not. I set my sight on you. I decided then I would work harder than I ever worked before. It
Was then that I found myself at the top of the 2D.
I won my first gold belt buckle. I won a little money. Still I wasn't anything because everyone talked about you. I
would even tell them that you and I were friends even though I knew we no longer were. You were the girl that everyone
had to beat if they were going to win and they knew it. It was rare that anyone did beat you. You see, I was
even getting tougher to beat myself. I was proud of that fact however I would have rather you were there to share my
trials and tribulations with but you were long gone now. We never even spoke when we saw each other anymore.
It was then, when you and your friends, became complacent with the success you were having. It was here, this moment,
I was still working my butt off every day, in the heat, in the cold, in the rain, in the snow, even when the dust
would blow. I was covered in sweat and the determination only grew. I felt myself working harder than I ever had in my
life and it showed up when I started running in the 1D and that is the first time in the long time you that you looked
over at me with any sign of recognition in your eyes. I wondered did you miss the friend that you once had in me.
I was a pro now, turning thirty. I was no longer behind you, I was running head to head with you. We rode the same roads
and signed up for the same rodeos. It soon became evident that I was working harder as I became the name everyone would
beging to talk aobut. The barrel racer all the young girls wanted to be. That dream we dreamed when were little girls was
now slipping further from you and closer for me. I even saw you once and tried to talk with you. I could see you were not
happy for me, jealous is how you appeared to be. You were no longer the best friend I had when we were little girls on ponies.
Vegas was only a dream.
When I finally made it to Vegas I knew you would be at home watching it on TV. For ten days you would get to watch me
win some nights and then lose some nights. I don't know if you were rooting me on or wishing me failure. However, the
last night when they crowned me as the NFR Barrel Racing Champion I know the one person I was thinking of, was the one
person that I had always loved. It was you that I wanted to share this moment with more than any. I should had been
elated however all I felt was tears running down my cheeks as I raised me hand in victory. Because all I could think
about was where it all began, just you and I, two little girls on the backs of ponies and wishing I could feel that
happiness I felt way back then, when we were friends.
