23/12/2024
Merry Christmas and Happy Ho-lidays, friends! If you’re looking for some stress relief, consider coloring/illustrating the Night Before Christmas at Tuffy Love’s Truck Stop!
Twas the night before Christmas, and down at the lot,
The engines were rumbling; the trucks were all hot.
Diesels were idling, their drivers at ease,
Dreaming of home—or perhaps a st******se.
The lights of the truck stop cast quite the glow,
Highlighting the glamour of one Dr. Tuffy Love, Ho!
With a wig stacked high and heels sky-high too,
She strutted the lot in her red patent shoes.
Her lashes were longer than I-55,
Her makeup? Perfection, not a flaw you could find.
Fishnets were ripped, but intentionally so—
Tuffy Love knows how to put on a show.
The truckers all stared as she sashayed by,
A glittering queen beneath the night sky.
“Who needs a chimney?” she purred with a wink.
“I’ll slide down your cab faster than you think.”
When out on the lot there arose such a clatter,
Tuffy spun on her heel to see what was the matter.
A truck horn blared loud, its engine did roar,
And there came a big rig like none seen before.
It was decked out in garlands, with wreaths on the side,
And on the cab’s roof, Santa sat with his ride.
But these weren’t reindeer, oh no, far from that—
Eight dazzling drag queens, each in a sequin hat.
“On RuPaul! On Bianca! On Lana, yes!
On Trixie! On Katya! On Jinkx in her dress!
To the top of the diner, to the edge of the lot—
We’ve got presents to spread, and the night’s getting hot!”
Santa leapt down with a bag full of glam,
Saying, “Tuffy Love, darling, I’m your biggest fan.
You’ve brought joy to this lot with your sass and your style,
So let me give back—sit down for a while.”
He handed out lipsticks, he gave out new wigs,
Tossing lashes and fishnets to truckers in digs.
A disco ball dropped from the back of his sleigh,
And they all danced together till the break of day.
As dawn started breaking, Santa climbed in his truck,
Blowing kisses to Tuffy, who was awestruck.
And he called as he rolled out, his voice full of cheer,
“Merry Christmas to all, and a fierce New Year!”