Botanisör Florist Launceston

Botanisör Florist Launceston Local florist on the outskirts of the Launceston CBD cocooned in Miledge Lane.
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Do you got natives? Yeah, we got natives. We got fantastic native flowers. You know some things are best left unsaid. I ...
19/09/2025

Do you got natives? Yeah, we got natives. We got fantastic native flowers.
You know some things are best left unsaid. I often realise that after I say them. You see I’m the reason HR has to keep updating their policies. My favourite so far has been, no one is to cook cheese on toast in the toaster. Or use the toaster on its side. So…
Tiny Repulsive Utterly Moronic Pe*****le man was honored with an opulent tax payer funded State banquet while he backs a genocide and burns the world. It’s rich people sucking rich people while telling middle class people to blame the poor people. And we can all see he don’t know how to blend. Mel, take that pole out you jacksie and help granpa/ insurance policy out. Blend him. I don’t care if you use a mop.
Maybe we could try turning him off and then… look a button… forgot my train of thought.
And now we have the reappearance of an art movement not seen since the N@z!’$. We now have Neo Degenerate art. Anything considered anti-patriotic by the ruling Government.
I’m off to work on my fitness a bit more. I can’t run away from my problems at this rate.
Other flowers are available in store, like iris, chrysanthemum, lilies and delphinium. Just to name a few. And foliages too. Pop in and say Hi.
Have a great weekend and remember we know life is hard but we are not dumb enough to think it is hard because of immigrants.

☎️ 6334 9187, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or 🍔🍟🧃112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

Ladies, Gentlemen and variations there of, can we get a round of applause for these ranunculi. Just stunning. Not like m...
17/09/2025

Ladies, Gentlemen and variations there of, can we get a round of applause for these ranunculi. Just stunning.
Not like me, I’m less hot mess and more room temperature inconvenience. Cos if being sexy was a crime… I’d be in gaol for tax fraud.
Was the diapered dictators face at half mast for Charlie this week? Oh no, it’s a stroke. And we don’t mean as in beauty pageant.
It also remind me that artificial intelligence is not as great a threat as natural stupidity. Like the kid that asked me what Hi**er’s last name was. If you come across a kid who believes that Hi**er Kardashian was a bad, bad man. Yeah that was me.
Like the customer who came in with their arm in a cast. I asked what they’d done. Broke it in two places. Ouch! So I advised them to not go to those places anymore.
And boohoo to Israeli politician May Golon who is in a bit of trouble. The self confessed “proud racist”, is facing fraud charges for misuse of funds, running a fake employment scheme and her advisor using his home as a drug lab. Well, a boys got to have a side hustle. At least he’s not a peado and on that list.
Had some great protea delivered. Stunning. And phylica too. It’s beautiful fresh and dries fantastically too. It looks like sea anemones.
Keep up the good work and remember this is the kind of town where you don’t have to lock your bike up. But I would recommend you do so if you don’t want it stolen.

☎️ 6334 9187, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or 🧷⚗️🚲 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

I do have it all together … I really do… I just can’t seem to find it right now.But what I do have a handle on is that t...
15/09/2025

I do have it all together … I really do… I just can’t seem to find it right now.
But what I do have a handle on is that the refugee and asylum seeker system costs this country far, far less than the loss in annual tax avoidance by billionaires and foreign companies. Free gas, oil and water, then they pay very little to no tax on top of it. The misconception is further exasperated by media companies who profit from the hysteria they create. By the media barons who have investments in gas and oil companies. Then there are the politicians who collect “donations” from said companies and billionaires so they vote the right way.
We are being lied to and charged for the privilege. The longer we are distracted the longer they can get away with it. But, if you want to decrease the flow of refugees and asylum seekers, many of whom risk their lives to get here, stop “Western 1st World” countries from destabilizing “Third World” countries. And STOP stealing their resources.
On the flower front, we have oodles of seasonal goodies from the farms. The variety for this time of year is staggering. And our prices, more than reasonable. So don’t get me started on stupidmarkets. We sell fresh AND full bunches. If you don’t need a full bunch, we do by the stem too.
Oh, and calling bigotry an opinion is like calling arsenic a flavour.
Have a great week and remember never ask a lady her age, a man his salary or Israel for evidence.

☎️ 6334 9187, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or ☮️❤️🫘 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

And another PB. I swear. I need to swear. I have sworn, lots. No, really if the world was a Monopoly game we’d be at the...
12/09/2025

And another PB. I swear. I need to swear. I have sworn, lots. No, really if the world was a Monopoly game we’d be at the part where everybody rage quits because all the property is gone, the bank is broke, rent is unaffordable and one rich guy is ruining everyone’s fun.
Let’s chill, have a picnic, share our sandwiches, tea and cupcakes and give each other flowers.
It’s incredible to me how many of our global issues have been caused by three white men in their 70’s clinging to power to avoid gaol. And I also wonder how RFK Jr has less brains than his uncle.
Which does remind me, don’t you hate it when you forget what you forgot? Life lesson, always carry a pen and paper to add to the shopping list. Don’t forget shopping list when going shopping. Remember to read shopping list while shopping.
The weather looks decent over the weekend, so if you’re planning a soirée, let us help freshen up the house and lessen the cleaning time. Because nobody will ever look behind the fridge till it’s broken or you’re moving. Enjoy life with people who make your life better.
Have a great weekend and remember it was Oscar Wilde that said, “ Some men improve the world only by leaving it”.

☎️ 6334 9187, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or 🏡💰🏨 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

Just as you think the world has gone completely crazy it sets a new PB. Israel has now bombed another of its neighbors j...
10/09/2025

Just as you think the world has gone completely crazy it sets a new PB.
Israel has now bombed another of its neighbors jeopardising peace in the Middle West and tried to set fire to another boat in the . As Australia has promised to recognize a Palestinian State and their right to exist, I do hope they do it while the Palestinians still do exist.
And hasn’t that pi**ed off Bibi. Well hopefully his unknown number of unknown nuclear weapons can’t reach us. All in the name of defending himself mind you.
As a person of a marginalised community I can identify with the Palestinians. We may not follow all your rules and customs and we may navigate ours between yours so as not to loose our culture, heritage and language but we will find a way to survive. I believe our indigenous family and friends can understand that also.
Now we see that the Israeli, British and American governments choose profit over humanity. And they are willing to silence their own people for profit.
Maybe I could start selling crap flowers at high prices so I can see my fantastic customers more often. Because selling good quality ones means I get to see them every few weeks. At least they come back happy. Nah, I will continue to sell quality flowers at fair prices to people who don’t suck at being human.
Keep up the good work and remember rebranding to the Dept. of War will not get you a Peace Prize. It’s like doing the horizontal tango for purity.

☎️ 6334 9187, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or ⛵️🔥🚤 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

As we sprung further into Spring this week our American, twice removed but they keep coming back, cousins are experienci...
08/09/2025

As we sprung further into Spring this week our American, twice removed but they keep coming back, cousins are experiencing fall. Not the Fall they call Autumn. No, the fall of civilization and the total collapse of that thing they call society. All due to El Presidummy.
Now I know it’s early but I’m thinking or dressing up as RFK Jr for Halloween. So I’m going to start gargling white vinegar and razor blades thrice a day to get the voice right. As I haven’t the decades of time to suck on a crack pipe like he did. Here’s to burnt out vocal cords.
And by the way is everyone aware that Google and YouTube signed a $45 Million deal with Israel to spread Gaza genocide propaganda. OK, you do now.
Oh and if you feed your children frozen pizza and chicken nuggets, you are a terrible parent. Please find the time to microwave them first. The food not the children. How big is your microwave?
Heaps going on here in the shop. Keeping our candle sale going as we all need a treat and some meditation time. And fresh flowers in the house will lift your spirits and strengthen our community. Plus child services will notice the flowers and not the dust. Look at us adulting using loopholes. Like stopping at the supermarket after school pick up. Let them fill up on free fruit before we go home. No need to buy anything.
Have a great week and remember if you need to borrow money, borrow it from a pessimist. They don’t expect to get it back. Win- win.

☎️ 6334 9187, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or 🇺🇸🪥🥸 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

It’s Friyay and I am mortified. I was using the phone camera to do some tidying up down there. To be blunt, the garden n...
05/09/2025

It’s Friyay and I am mortified. I was using the phone camera to do some tidying up down there. To be blunt, the garden needed whipper snipping. Well I got to work then started seeing all these likes. I was live streaming! 45 likes later and one very rude message but yes you can buy me a latte… vicar.
Now a reminder if you want flowers for Valentine’s Day, you probably should start planting them now.
Hail to the Federal Supreme Court… of Ethiopia. Whose criminal sentencing guidelines have been updated and it has been announced that if r**e leads to death or serious physical/ mental harm the punishment it will incur is life imprisonment or death. Now that’s disincentivization.
What if “umbrellas” were ment to be “brellas”, but the person who named it hesitated? Maybe the same person who named “pires”.
Loads of fresh seasonal flowers in stock, including stock, looking for a good home. Or even an average one. We’re not the RSPA.
But we are open till 1 tomorrow.
Have a great weekend and remember Hugo Lennon who co-organised the”March for Australa”, and who blames the housing crisis on immigrants is the son and grandson of property developers Peet Ltd. The same company hoarding 30 000 empty properties.

☎️ 6334 9187, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or ✂️🏡☕️ 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

Did you know that the world’s oldest living and working fashion model is 94 years old. Carmen Dell’Orefice began modelin...
03/09/2025

Did you know that the world’s oldest living and working fashion model is 94 years old. Carmen Dell’Orefice began modeling in 1946 and is still in demand. When you’re good, you’re great.
On the other hand there’s the American Idiot. The type of person. (my lawyers made me call him that. I still prefer Knobjockey), (or Bellend),who would make pre shredded cheese illegal. Just to make America grate again. I hear he’s a bit under the weather at the moment so we are sending clots and prayers. Sorry, prayers of clots.
Which reminds me, if Mediums can communicate with the dead, imagine what’ a Large could do.
I’m sorry, but you can’t “always” be experiencing a higher volume of calls than average. That’s not how average works.
And if you want to be a Neo-Nazi protesting about immigration, my suggestion is, DON’T. Especially when you are an immigrant yourself. Because if we think your racist idea just might work, we will start with you.
Keep up the good work and remember if the value you place on teachers doesn’t match the value you place on a better future, than you have failed the most important lesson of all. Without housing, health and education a society will not flourish.

☎️ 6334 9187, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or 👠🧀📚 112 Cimitiere Steet, Launceston.

We start Spring with a baby update. The baby birds flew the nest on Saturday. Well, they jumped. Mama rounded them up an...
01/09/2025

We start Spring with a baby update. The baby birds flew the nest on Saturday. Well, they jumped. Mama rounded them up and spent the day finding food and filling them up. Sunday they birded up and left the car park to find out what life is all about. And hopefully p**p on bigots.
Due to the rising cost of health care and the availability of Dr appointments I have resorted to Backyard Healthcare. It’s not an organization, I just go p*e under a tree in the backyard and wait. If ants gather = diabetes. If the grass dries up = high salts. If it smells like BBQ = high cholesterol. If I forget to pull my pants up = Alzheimer’s. If it looks like a sprinkler = Parkinson’s. Due to no trees in my yard the unhoused and I have chosen a different tree each in the park. Launceston’s newest outdoor pathology lab on the kanamaluka riviera.
To test if you are a bigot, eat four liters of ice cream as fast as you can. If you get brain freeze, you’re not a bigot. And if you recently started believing that different groups of people deserve to be treated as less than humans with no compassion, you may have been kicked in the head by a horse.
And as our Spring starts Greta Thunberg and many other activists have overnight left Barcelona in a flotilla of 20 boats represented by citizens of 44 countries. Heading to break the siege of Gaza and deliver humanitarian aid. The Global Sumud flotilla will be joined by more boats from Tunis, Catania, Genoa and the Asian flotilla. The world’s largest ever humanitarian flotilla. Doing something because the World’s leaders thoughts, prayers & stern threats are… useless!
Anyway thanks for coming to my rant/ Ted talk/ breakdown. We sell fresh flowers and gifts sourced right here in the State while trying to make people happy and maintain a circular economy. While the smiles and glee of customers finding a magical place in the store really does keep me going.
Have a great week and remember I hate pop up notifications unless they are from a toaster.

☎️ 6334 9187, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.vom or ⛵️🕊️🫶 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

It’s Friyay and Winter has one more crack in its tail. So just a reminder that we have besides flowers, candles, skin ba...
29/08/2025

It’s Friyay and Winter has one more crack in its tail. So just a reminder that we have besides flowers, candles, skin balms and bath-bombs for a truly self care relaxing weekend.
Is Gin and vodka self care? In moderation, got yah. That’s why my house is called “Moderation”. We also stock both of them too. Tasmanian distilled.
Why is it when a Brit, American or Australian move to another country they are called Ex Pats? When a Mexican, Thai or Nigerian do the same they are called immigrants? So ex pat is a choice but an immigrant is poverty, desperation or a threat? Is it skin colour or bank balance that determines this language?
Me, I’d rather live next door to immigrants and refugee than a fascist or a racist.
And if you’re struggling this time of year let me offer a little motivation. Even a broke crackhead can find a way to get high. You too will find a way forward. To succeed, not get high.
Have a great weekend, stay warm and remember meat eaten as comfort food is also an emotional support animal. Emotional support artichoke if you’re vegan.

☎️ 6334 9187, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or 💨🐄🍆 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

Its a wet old Wednesday. So stay warm, dry and find a nice bowl of soup for dinner. Jammies, toast & tomato soup is the ...
27/08/2025

Its a wet old Wednesday. So stay warm, dry and find a nice bowl of soup for dinner. Jammies, toast & tomato soup is the tradition. I’m bucking that with Barley & white bean. Don’t knock it till you try it. Fibre never tasted so good.
Did I tell you the new plants arrived? Rubber plants, peace lily, prayer plants, spring bulbs and a few large Peperomia. And string of pearls. Owh, and some Senecio, formally known as Cineraria. In blue or purple. Pop on in and have a gander.
You know if the idiots running the world do start WWIII, you know the millennials will call it “wheee”. And somehow that makes me feel better.
Random thought, Israel has the right to go F*€K itself.
I’m writing a play about the writing of the American constitution and it goes like this:
Ben Franklin: write down “No dumb ass President.“
Alex Hamilton: Stop saying that.
Ben Franklin: I’m telling you you’re going to regret not writing that down.
Stay warm and if you get cold the best way to warm up is to hug a friend. Or a stranger. Or Mitch Brown. Congratulations Mitch, you have made the lives of so many youngsters so much better by being brave and honest.
Keep up the good work and remember worrying is like walking around with an open umbrella waiting for it to rain. Close it and only open it when it’s needed. Like today.

☎️ 6334 9187, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or 🪴🏉🥫112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

Proving that weddings do not have to cost the Earth.   Try this cheery little number. Forget the magazines and the influ...
25/08/2025

Proving that weddings do not have to cost the Earth. Try this cheery little number. Forget the magazines and the influencers. Do it your way and make it memorable.
If you are after something a bit different, we are your people. Let’s talk.
We don’t care what you believe in. We only care how you treat people. Enough with the white, creams & browns. Be the authentic you want to see in the world.
Speaking of, why is it when the rich rob the poor it’s called business, but when the poor fight back it is called violence? When people point out the government’s hypocrisy it is called terrorism? Do these guys need a dictionary?
We align with leaders of compassion. As the third member of the holy trinity,(Dolly Parton, The Dalai Lama and), Jacinda Ardern said in a sp*ech at Yale University, “Empathy has never started a war, never sought to take the dignity of others and empathy teaches you that power is interchangeable with another word, responsibility. “
It is also our responsibility to not extort profits at the cost of people, customs, culture or the environment.
So if you would like a shopping experience where you are celebrated for your uniqueness rather than being tolerated, give us a try. “I”may not like your choice but I will respect it. It’s all the freaky people make the beauty of the world.
Have a great week and remember the USA is the only country to ever drop nuclear weapons to decide which countries can be trusted with nuclear weapons.

☎️ 6334 9187, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or 🦄🌈💐 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

Address

Shop 5/112 Cimitiere Street
Launceston, TAS
7250

Opening Hours

Monday 8:30am - 5:30pm
Tuesday 8:30am - 5:30pm
Wednesday 8:30am - 5:30pm
Thursday 8:30am - 5:30pm
Friday 8:30am - 5:30pm
Saturday 8:30am - 1am

Telephone

+61363349187

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