Botanisör Florist Launceston

Botanisör Florist Launceston Local florist on the outskirts of the Launceston CBD cocooned in Miledge Lane.
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It’s hard to start the week on a positive note but here goes. I positively will not take defence advice from former Prim...
23/06/2025

It’s hard to start the week on a positive note but here goes. I positively will not take defence advice from former Prime Minister Scott got nothing to do with me Morrison. As he went from trying to lead the country and sighting us up to AUKUS, not a free trial, to being a lobbyist for America Global Strategies where he worked with now Defence Undersecretary Elmbridge Colby and DYNE Maritime. Someone check his pockets for feathers.
But I have seen a attorneys office called Hound Wolfe & Chase. Sounds like a law firm run by dogs. Do you think their attorneys are seven times more experienced at chasing down pats owed? Did your human break a treat in half an pass it off as a whole? You may be entitled to compensation. Paw is today. Leave a message if we are out chasing ambulances.
As it is getting closer to Christmas inJuly, here’s a Yulish tide joke. What do Santa and Bill Cosby have in common? Neither will come if your awake.
Oh yeah, we also sell flowers if you didn’t know. I think that’s the point of this social(?) media platform.
Have a great week and remember the mandarin madman has more sexual misconduct allegations, (all because I can’t type a four letter word), than the National Collegiate Association has transgender athletes.

☎️ 6334 9187, 💻 www.botanisorflorist.com or 🚣‍♀️🚿🏋️‍♂️ 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

There is so much on, today is World Refugee day, while the Americans,(the good ones), are celebrating Juneteenth or the ...
20/06/2025

There is so much on, today is World Refugee day, while the Americans,(the good ones), are celebrating Juneteenth or the emancipation of the slaves and tomorrow is the Winter solstice. The best day to spend in bed as it’s the shortest day. It’s almost guilt free.
It’s funny how the USA send Israel $3.8 billion a year and guess which one has universal healthcare and free universities? Hint, it’s not America.
While the human Cheeto is not happy. He launched his line of gold, made in America,(not sure if the components are), smart phones. The map on it features the Gulf of Mexico. Eric and Donjr are said to be in hiding.
So, is it true that the library has a sign up that reads “Please note: the post apocalyptic fiction section has been moved to Current Affairs”. Go find out for yourself. And let me know.
And hats off to the courageous trans-woman at a swimming competition in the UK who was made to participate in the men’s race. So she lined up and wore the same speedos as the men. Letting the organisers deal with the mammaries, ooops, memories.
Have a great weekend and remember knowledge is power, yet so many powerful people know so little.

☎️ 6334 9187, 💻 www.botanisorflorist.com or 📲🩲🥶 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

Are you hanging in this Humpday? If you need a pick me up, a nineteen century word for a penguin was an “arsefoot”. Why ...
18/06/2025

Are you hanging in this Humpday? If you need a pick me up, a nineteen century word for a penguin was an “arsefoot”. Why did we change it? Can we change it back just so I can hear Sir David say it?just once. Please.
Don’t fotrget we have low-fat, sugar free, vegan parking out front. Every little helps.
In saying that, in which part of the economy are we in when you have to buy “I can’t believe I can’t afford I can’t believe it’s not butter”? And instead of generic hand sanitiser you have to buy… soap. Not sure of bacteria but it does kill 99.9% of dirt.
Is the reason the Chinese can’t play cricket because they could dominate the game with just one bat?
Anywho keep up the good work and remember nothing is wrong with changing your opinion on something after learning new information. It’s a sign of intelligence.

☎️ 6334 9287, 💻 www.botanisorflorist.com or 🏏🦇🫖 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

I am so feeling like an IPhone5 today because I am no longer functioning properly, no one’s wanted me in years and even ...
16/06/2025

I am so feeling like an IPhone5 today because I am no longer functioning properly, no one’s wanted me in years and even when I do charge overnight I’m dead by 11. How’s your Monday going?
Now because some may be feeling a bit overwhelmed by the the world right now we concur it is time to hygge. What is hygge I hear you think? It is the Danish/ Norwegian concept of cosines and comfort especially as it relates to one’s home. It describes a snug, content mood evoked by comfort and conviviality.
So we are having a Hugge candle sale. 25% off small or large candles. And in the spirit of hygge we will also include bath bombs. A fizzy bath with scented candles, a good book, you could colour me contented.
Speaking of I’m trying my hand at writing, how do you think I’m going?
“Her body tensed and quivered as she felt wave after wave surge through her. Don’t think she had ever encountered an electric fence before.”
Have a great week, stay safe and remember dogs prepare you for babies. Cats prepare you for teenagers.

☎️ 6334 9187, 💻 www.botanisorflorist .com or 🕯️🛀🏽📚 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

Happy birthday DJT. See black is the better orange.
14/06/2025

Happy birthday DJT. See black is the better orange.

As y’all have been enjoying the more modern arrangements, here for your listening pleasure is a little number we call, R...
13/06/2025

As y’all have been enjoying the more modern arrangements, here for your listening pleasure is a little number we call, Red, white & blue with native yellow.
Here is an idea to champion to the council, retro fitting holders onto public rubbish bins to hold cans and bottles. These can then be collected by the unhoused or needy with dignity to keep the city clean, support themselves and keep resources from land fill. If they need help or inspiration , look to Norway.
Last week on my way to work a lady stopped me and commented “You must work out”, I thanked her “No. You MUST work out” she retorted. So I joined a gym. Week one, no, that’s what they call me, Weak-one. Well I knitted these leg warmers and I can’t wear them anywhere else. Bu**er.
So don’t open your umbrella under a ladder, throw a black cat over your shoulder, break a leg or cross your wishbone, however you celebrate Friday 13th, enjoy. And what is it with feet? Shoes, human or horse and rabbits feet?
Anywho, have a great weekend and remember wine is essentially grape juice with a yeast infection.

☎️ 6334 9187, 💻 www.botanisorflorist.com or 🐈‍⬛🪜☂️ 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

P.S. it’s DJT’s birthday tomorrow, so as a surprise the world is flooding the internet with pics of Barack Obama…oh he will laugh himself silly…see not one incontinence joke.

The sun is out and it’s Humpday what more could you want? Besides a jar of pickled onions. Do you know what the oldest l...
11/06/2025

The sun is out and it’s Humpday what more could you want? Besides a jar of pickled onions.
Do you know what the oldest living thing in Tassie is? No it’s not Eric Abetz, that’s just his ideas. It’s a plant. Called Kings Holly, or Lomatia tasmanica to it’s friends. It has been dated to 43,500 years old, while each individual plant’s lifespan is 300 years. But, here’s the kicker, it’s one plant. It’s the only plant on this planet. It multiplies by cloning itself. It has seen the dinosaurs go and the first humans arrive. Imagine how much it has in its supperanuation by now.
Now we don’t stock anything that old. Our plants and flowers are as fresh as an oyster.
Keep up the good work and remember do not shrink yourself to be digestible, let them choke.

☎️ 6334 9187, 💻 www.botanisorflorist #.com or 🪴🗺️🔽 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

As it’s looking like a full on news week, let’s start with a zen arrangement, for this week only, gracing the grand shar...
10/06/2025

As it’s looking like a full on news week, let’s start with a zen arrangement, for this week only, gracing the grand sharing table .
With Melon and Donny reenacting Alien Vs Predator, but with less sympathy, Greta and friends standing up against starvation, the Kremlin cretin, riots, floods and elections, we may need to touch some grass. Smell some roses. Or just enjoy some flowers.
So if you see someone struggling, make their day and bring a smile to their face. Tell us it’s for someone’s mental health and we will make sure it doesn’t break the bank. From a stem to a bunch. We care too.
Speaking of banks breaking, according to our last electricity bill we have also been charged for the sunlight, moonlight, the street light, the light of the Holy Spirit and the light at the end of the tunnel. I thought we were a renewable energy State?
Now over the long weekend I went to a silent disco. Ok, it turns out my AirPods were not connecting. But I had a great time dancing my cares away.
Have a great week and remember you can go from Person of the Year to Antisemite of the week if you care stand up for the environment and want to feed starving children.

☎️ 6334 9187, 💻 www.botanisorflorist.com or 🌺🌼🌸 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

Every bike is a folding bike if you put enough effort into it but not every boat is a gravy boat. Now that I have your a...
06/06/2025

Every bike is a folding bike if you put enough effort into it but not every boat is a gravy boat.
Now that I have your attention, have I told you about our Tasmanian grown seasonal flowers? Cards? Candles? Plants & boozes? Then perfumes, soaps & balms? Well we deliver too! OK, back to regular programming.
Do clown fish ever get frustrated that nobody takes them seriously?
Speaking of, Frump and Teflon broke up. And in Pride month! Is it because the African-Canadian-American didn’t wear a suit in the Oval Office last photo op? The plot is murkier than a P***y Brewster ménage a trios. I’m betting one of them will turn up in Pam’s shower.
If there are seahorses and sea cows… do you think they have sea rodeos?
Anywho have a great weekend and stay dry. We will be open Sat till 1pm if you do need floral assistance, a refuge or to excite the senses, and remember in American English there is a silent K in Knight, two in Knickerbocker and three in Republican.
EDIT; we will be closed Monday for Charlie's birthday.

☎️ 6334 9187, 💻 www.botanisorflorist.com or 🤡🐠🌊🐄 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

It’s colder than a witch’s tittie out there and orange is for healing. According to the flag. Enjoy. On the other hand, ...
04/06/2025

It’s colder than a witch’s tittie out there and orange is for healing. According to the flag. Enjoy.
On the other hand, the flowers are loving it so cool. On the other other hand, I’m having lunch in the fridge. It’s warmer.
I think I’m a robot. I failed the “I am not a robot “ test three times. We are arguing over whether a picture of a motorbike is a actually a motorbike. It has two wheels and an engine. It’s a motorbike! Computer says no. So if I am now a robot , just want you to know , I’m leaking oil.
Why haven’t Elon’s baby mamas not unionised by now?
You know if you put your ear on a strangers thigh, you can actually hear them say “What in the Mary-Kate Olsen are you doing?”
OK, it’s a scooter!
Keep up the good work and remember if a frog parks illegally it will get toad.

☎️ 6334 9187, 💻 www.botanisorflorist.com or 🐸🍄🏍️🛵 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

As it’s now June, it is Winter and Pride month around the world. So we will go with yellow today because Gilbert Baker ...
02/06/2025

As it’s now June, it is Winter and Pride month around the world. So we will go with yellow today because Gilbert Baker who designed the flag said yellow is for sunlight. And we could use a bit of that today.
Also, congratulations to Oslo Pride for producing an amazing short film to promote their cities Pride. It shows in the most human way that those stripes of colour mean safety and acceptance to so many. Find it at .
Making the news as well is Elon who is retiring from politics to spend more time on ketamine, oops, I mean less time with his families. By making more families.
On the local front, we are trying desperately to keep bouquets and boxes of flowers in the floor but they just keep getting bought.
Oh well, when life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic.
Have a great week and remember there is no such thing as a grumpy person. The truth is once you get old you stop being polite and start being honest.

☎️ 6334 9187, 💻 www.botanisorflorist.com or ♥️🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤🩶🩷🩵🤍 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

In case your clock has frozen, like ours, it’s Friyay. Let it go…Also it has come to my attention, community warning, th...
30/05/2025

In case your clock has frozen, like ours, it’s Friyay. Let it go…
Also it has come to my attention, community warning, that there is a pant being grown around the state that if you sat under it for as little as ten minutes you would die. So be very careful of water lilies.
Our flowers are very safe. Except if you or your recipient have allergies. Tell us and we will steer you clear of the offenders towards sinus friendly flowers. We do pet friendly too. Talk to us under your breath if you need to get something for that mother-in-law. We keep the triffids and poison oak out the back. No questions asked.
If we live in a capitalist society, why are the corporations and banks socialist? The government will always bail them out for free. With our money. And which ones actually pay tax?
Eating too much cake is the sin of gluttony. However eating too much pie is OK because the sum of pi is zero. And Eating
chocolate bars are an affordable indulgent luxury. Perfect for sharing. They also do chocolate rock candy. And we stock it.
Have a great weekend and remember some people need no proof to believe a lie but demand endless proof to accept the truth.

☎️ 6334 9187, 💻 www.botanisorflorist.com or 🍫🪷🍫112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

Address

Shop 5/112 Cimitiere Street
Launceston, TAS
7250

Opening Hours

Monday 8:30am - 5:30pm
Tuesday 8:30am - 5:30pm
Wednesday 8:30am - 5:30pm
Thursday 8:30am - 5:30pm
Friday 8:30am - 5:30pm
Saturday 8:30am - 1am

Telephone

+61363349187

Website

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