Joseph Parker-Kemp - Alba Heathen Celebrant

Joseph Parker-Kemp - Alba Heathen Celebrant Heathen Pagan Celebrant - Joseph Parker-Kemp. Weddings and more before your ancestors, the vaettir and the gods.

In this season of reflection of the past and looking to the future, we may want to take some time to reflect on those we...
30/10/2024

In this season of reflection of the past and looking to the future, we may want to take some time to reflect on those we have lost. This is brought to the front of the minds of those who served, or had family who served, with Remembrance Day coming up.

The past week or so, I’ve been scrolling through Fill Your Boots as Alfie makes his way through his inbox of dedication posts of those we have lost in the Forces community. (For those not in the know, FYB is a page typically dedicated to military banter). I scrolled dreading to see the face of a decent person that I have just fallen out of contact with. This year seems to have been a change in mood as I see more suicides in dedication, which is disheartening yet progress in a way of acknowledging mental health issues within our community, which aggravated that fear that someone who I used to sleep next to in my doss bag or drink in the Squadron Bar with had gone and I had been ignorant.

Remembrance is an act that is so ingrained into humanity that I could not point fingers as to its origins, instead I’ll talk about Remembrance in the context of Heathenry and my view of it. There is an aspect of Bragafull/Symbel that is still practised today, or at least up until 2019 when I fell out of the know. Amongst the drinking to boasts and to oaths, there was the Minni. While some attestations talk about Minni in terms of toasts dedicated to gods, there was a small moment dedicated to the memory of departed friends. In a culture with a heavy emphasis on battle of warrior culture (Not entirely dedicated though), there was still a moment of solemnity and recognition of the heaviness associated with the loss of departed friends.

The last time I was on parade for Remembrance, small shots of port were passed around, and three toasts were given. The last of them being in memory of absent friends. Whether it’s coincidence, or the tradition passed down through some branch of society, it doesn’t matter. What matters is that despite the Christian nature of Remembrance Day does not mean as Heathens we have to sit at the sidelines and ignore what is still relevant to us. We may not pray their prayers, or sing their songs, but we can respectfully and solemnly be present in honouring those who aren’t with us anymore.

Be they in Fólkvangr, Valhalla, Hel, or the afterlives of their denomination, I think it would be wise to acknowledge that loss, feel it for what it is, and speak to those closest to us about it. However, I think it would be wise that in the process of uplifting those who have already passed, we do not neglect those who are struggling now. Check in with your battle buddies, be someone who they can talk to, don’t let your ignorance to the issue turn someones beautiful, glorious poem into another statistic.

Help is always a call away.

Samaritans (For anyone) - Call 24 hours: 116 123

Shout (For anyone) - Text 24 Hours: 85258

Combat Stress (Serving and their families) - Call 24 hours: 0800 323 4444

Combat Stress (Veterans and their families) - Call 24 Hours: 0800 138 1619 Text 24 Hours: 07537 173683
Email: [email protected]

26/10/2024

I think, in the context of Paganism, we can not go forward talking about wedding traditions without acknowledging the efforts of the activists before us that worked for us to exercise to marry as per our custom. Without the foundations of the activists in the late 60’s through to today, Pagans would not be able to perform legal marriages as per the traditions I lay out below, particularly on the front of the Scottish Pagan Federation in regards to Scotland. Without organisations like this doing the boring and mundane activity in the background, and interfacing with governmental organisations like the Registrar General in order to provide a community service, we would not be able to exercise our rights combined without jumping through hoops.

While some in the community have the view that we shouldn’t need the government to deem our marriages valid, unfortunately the isolationist method can do more harm than good. By not participating in the systems that govern us, we do not become immune to them, rather powerless to protest against changes that will be harmful to us. By locking ourselves out of the meeting room, the meeting continues without regard for our beliefs.

My view on the use of the providing of the service, and the use of it, we as a community solidify the work of the activists before us. By continually engaging with the Registrars, the more they see a Pagan organisation on the paperwork, and the more we expose those around us to our traditions the more we solidify the normalcy of our existence and leave behind the cloak of the feared unknown and become the warm face of familiarity.

So why Pagan celebrants when Humanist celebrants are perfectly capable of performing the legal function and don’t mind the differences in the ceremony? It achieves the same thing, two Pagans getting married in the eyes of the law. Except it doesn’t achieve the entire picture.

Some humanist celebrants are wholly ignorant that Paganism is legally recognised in Scotland, misguiding their clients into thinking that the only way they can have a legal wedding is by having a humanist perform it. Some also do this as it affects their bottom line to be honest. Some would entirely dismiss the premise of our ceremonies, as some want to when it comes to the topic of belief.

In my perspective, when a Pagan marriage is carried out by a representative of a Pagan Organisation, three things are achieved in a single motion.

1. The couple are able to express their love and commitment to each other before the law.

2. The couple are able to express their love and commitment to each other before their deities.

3. The couple, the witness’, the celebrant and all others attending with respect, have performed a small act of activism.

While I don’t think I need to explain the first two, the third I will. By having Paganism in the denomination of every legal piece of paperwork, in the act of the ceremony itself by calling upon deities and ancestors, by those witnessing with respect we are all exercising our human rights as Pagans and allies opposed to as individuals. By doing so, we are part of the continuing conversation surrounding our rights to manifest our religion.

Even if it is a whisper in the noise of larger discourse, enough whispers can become deafening.

14/10/2024

Þá skyldi blóta í móti vetri til árs, en at miðjum vetri blóta til gróðrar, hit þriðja at sumri, þat var sigrblót.

There should be a sacrifice at the beginning of winter for a good year, and in the middle of winter for a good crop, the third in summer day, that was the sacrifice for victory. - Ynglinga Saga, Chapter 8.

This morning, as I head to my car to head out for some volunteer work, I noticed the cars and stone covered in our first frost!

Because of Aberdeens climate, I have found this to be the most reliable marker for the heralding of Winter. So tonight, Sylwia and I will be performing our Vatrnætr (Wintersnight) blót.

There is many debates and definitions of when we should celebrate certain feasts, but for this feast it largely depends on your local climate and the markers you would call the start of winter.

By my definitions, and this year's lunar calendar, the Heathen Jól in Aberdeen will fall on the 15th of December (3 Full Moons after Vatrnætr).

The crops have been brought in, the nights grow longer, and we must sit to take stock of what we have gained and what we have lost in the past year. Thank for the past year and give offering the gods for a good year ahead, while we make preparations to hunker down for the winter.

So, for those who will have celebrated, are celebrating and yet to celebrate, I bid you a good Vatrnætr.

Keys, we see them mentioned regarding the passing of the household keys to the bride during the marriage ceremony, but w...
03/09/2024

Keys, we see them mentioned regarding the passing of the household keys to the bride during the marriage ceremony, but why?

We first see the imagery of keys associated with women in Þrymskviða when Þór disguises himself as Freyja after Mjolnir is stolen:

Keys around him | let they rattle,

And down to his knees | hung woman's dress;

With gems full broad | upon his breast,

And a pretty cap | to crown his head. - Þrymskviða 19, Bellows Translation.

The emphasis of mentioning the keys in regards to Þór dressing as a high-born woman suggests that the wearing of keys was not usual for men, although the link to it being associated with marriages is tenuous as the keys are worn before ór’s arrival at the ceremony.

We see the key being associated with the dress of a woman during a wedding in Rígsþula in regards to Snör:

Home did they bring | the bride for Karl,

In goatskins clad, | and keys she bore;

Snör was her name, | 'neath the veil she sat;

A home they made ready, | and rings exchanged,

The bed they decked, | and a dwelling made. - Rígsþula 23, Bellows Translation.

Again, we see Snör described before the wedding to be carrying keys. So where did this assumption that the key was passed to the bride as a signal of the beginning of married life? In terms of literary sources I CAN NOT FIGURE IT OUT. Dr Mary Wilhelmine Williams points to Corpus Poeticum Boreale for reference of the wedding being the first time a bride would carry keys, which is again the Þrymskviða reference. Williams argues for the symbolism of the bride holding the keys as her power over the indoor domain:

In spite of the fact that they were, in a sense, sold into matrimony and were the wards of their husbands, the legal wives really hold an honored position; and within their own homes they enjoyed much independence of action. The bunch of keys at the matron's belt was a real symbol of her control of matters indoors. Though the husband succeeded the father as guardian, he, like the former, showed a certain consideration for his wife's wishes, and even consulted her with reference to matters of weight. - Social Scandinavia in the Viking Age, Dr Mary Wilhelmine Williams.

In asserting this, Williams references; The Civilisation of Sweden, which is the repeat of the Þrymskviða reference; and the Origines Islandicae and Flóamanna saga which reflect the relationship between husband and wife.

Origines Islandicae seems to be an indication of Williams position of the woman's place within the household, though none to do with keys. The section referred to starts with a man seeking her approval to accept guests to over winter with them, to which she consents. Throughout the section, it becomes clear that an outbreak occurs of some sort of sickness and many die, including the hostess whose actions are spoken of by the guest as such:

“In a wonderful way is our hostess behaving now, for she is struggling upon her elbow, and is moving her feet from the bed stock and feeling after her shoes”

While I haven’t been able to secure an English translation of Flóamanna saga in a pdf or book form, the citation may be to do with Þorgils seeking advice from his wife Þóreyja regarding his dream of Þór trying to force his hand to convert, or his impending expedition may well go wrong. Another matter could be asking her if she wants to go to Greenland with him, to which she declines.

What about archeology? While it’s hard to tell with no international database for tumulus finds and contents, a majority of the keys found in grave mounds have been from those containing womens remains, some of which were highly stylised on the bow and chain which suggests one would wear them on display as a possible status symbol. Yet this doesn’t fully cement the idea of the exchange of the key at the wedding.

So what about today? I am not a fan of using two literary sources that are quite vague on the relationship between key and bride, had the sources been more varied or had been more clear of that relationship I would be happier with making certain leaps. But the archeology at least provides at least a physical realness to this possibility. It would also make sense, practically, to give your wife the keys to your household especially if you were one to go on frequent expeditions.

Now, obviously the historian's analysis will look into how Norse society was in the past in a way to try and understand it. This would obviously mean that the outcome would be that they would argue that the wife's domain would be generally domestic. This generally wouldn’t hold up today, particularly with younger generations who have to rely on multiple income sources in order to survive, we see today a general sharing of domestic duties at home.

That being said, what we can focus on instead is a precedent set within the sources cited. The key is not only the symbol of domain over the domestic, but a symbolic gesture that your wife has access to your concerns, trust, plans and secrets. That by giving her a key at your wedding, you will involve her in the decision making process in regards to your household. That should you have concerns over an upcoming life obstacle, you will confide in her.

The symbology of doing so would seem relevant in today's world, to tackle that one must be “stoic” from even the ones you love as it would be deemed “unmasculine” to do so in the eyes of others. That it would be normalised to be open about all matters regarding your oath and bond, that should be normalised once again.

01/09/2024

I would like to post a quick correction to this, as I seem to have glossed over Þrymskviða stanza 29:

Soon came the giant's | luckless sister,
Who feared not to ask | the bridal fee:
"From thy hands the rings | of red gold take,
If thou wouldst win | my willing love,
(My willing love | and welcome glad.)"

However, I would argue this doesn’t put any spiritual currency into the bridal price, but uses a common exchange between families to highlight the greed and lack of humility of the family of Thrym. It would also line up for a poetic telling of her death moments later by Thors hands:

32. The giant's sister | old he slew,
She who had begged | the bridal fee;
A stroke she got | in the shilling's stead,
And for many rings | the might of the hammer.

Edit of the correction:

Tacitus also mentions the dowry, however the main emphasis is put on the exchanging swords. So I would put more stock in the sword exchange than the mention of dowry.

29/08/2024

Our September conference, Exoterica September Conference, is almost here!

We want our conferences to be accessible to all Pagans. Our venue is in a central location with great accessibility, it will be live streamed, and we will have a quiet space for people on the day. We know how powerful community and connection can be so we don't want anyone to be excluded because of money.

Therefore, to support the Scottish Pagan community, we have decided to make some tickets available for free to Pagans who would otherwise be unable to attend.

If you are a Pagan who would like to attend our conference but would not be able to pay for a ticket, please email us at [email protected] and we will be able to offer you a ticket.

Please feel free to share this with any Pagans you know who may find this helpful.

29/08/2024

The Helsblot is concluded, the post made sacred through blot. The last altar and post to be removed from the Vé, she will stand once more in the Vé at the Asatru UK winternights moot, Hail Hel!

29/08/2024

Autumn and Winter weddings

As I watch the leaves start to brown and wither in the trees lining the roads on my way through Aberdeen, it makes me think of where we are in time and what impact this had on Heathen weddings in the past as well as what impacts it could have today.

So while there we can was a usual time for weddings in Norse society, this was largely due to a combination of factors to do with geography and weather, such as summer being the best time to sail for trade and raiding in the North and Baltic sea (Both seas generally get rough for even modern vessels from around October to March). Winters were also likely restrictive due to food scarcity or impediment to travelling longer distances because of snow and ice. This leaves Autumn as the most likely time, due to the abundance of food during the harvest season, returning traders who may carry some desirable goods such as good wines and generally when everyone would be home. There may have been some outliers, particularly with the wealthy who could probably afford holding larger feasts during the winter and were important enough that many would make the effort to travel for the occasion.

So instead of having a proscribed time in modern Heathenry, we should instead emphasise to couples to self-reflect on their own circumstances and make wise choices to account for them. Our struggles today are not the struggles of the past, and we should be mindful not to put ourselves in hardship in order to join the families together as it generally is a misstep in starting a new chapter in your lives.

To those living comfortably, a summer wedding can provide more opportunities for accommodation (in the form of camping) and is generally nicer for outdoor ceremonies and activities for all. For this reason, venues and suppliers tend to be busier making it hard to secure if you leave it until a year or under to book.

If you have a tighter budget, but still want to bring your close ones together, then autumn and winter weddings would probably be better suited. While the weather tends to be more versatile, venues generally cut their prices down by up to half and suppliers are less in demand so can be booked with ease. Provided with a suitable venue, firepits, fireplaces, candles, woollen blankets and gluhwein could build an atmosphere of frith and cosiness that shields from the cold outwith.

With the prescribed festival of Jól being a time of coming together, feasting, swearing great oaths and celebrating, it would be fitting to have a wedding to coincide for those closest to you to do just that. Depending on your geography, luck, and how you measure the date of Jól, you could very well find yourself performing the ceremony in the snow.

So should you fall in love with the colours of autumn, the biting cold of winter, or find it difficult to afford a summer wedding, then grab your blankets and start the fires to begin your new saga in the long night.

Love this, an unique historical replica.Would be perfect for the high table at the feast for the bride and groom!
28/08/2024

Love this, an unique historical replica.

Would be perfect for the high table at the feast for the bride and groom!

The blue of this claw beaker is so vibrant! Believe it or not, this glass is based off a 5th century find that's on display in the British museum! 😆
Grab yours here: https://loom.ly/tN8YYeg

27/08/2024

Good morning Heathens

What a weekend we have just had, our heartfelt thanks to all who attended Helsmoot this year! Blots and Sumbels observed, frith shared, feasts a plenty and the joy and merriment was palpable throughout! The weather was... interesting but made it all the more memorable.

Congratulations to the North West Heathens for winning the kindred games and the most sincerest gratitude to all the events team, the committee and the various volunteers who made the Great Heathen Gathering possible, your tireless work all year round to make AUK events possible is inspiring!

For now we are all going to take a week off to relax and realign before throwing ourselves into our next events, our community projects, the Nerthus Initiative and (drum roll please) Tyrsmoot!

That's right, next year we will be consecrating a Godpost in honour of Tyr!

Watch our spaces for updates!

Want to support Asatru UK in growing? Consider becoming a patron member for an annual fee of only £16!

https://www.asatruuk.org/patron

26/08/2024

Dowry

When initially researching for our own wedding, the topic of dowry kept on being mentioned everywhere I looked with no context or source, taking a lot of effort to just find mentions of this.

So, having read the sources they came from and my understanding of the translation, I have found no spiritual basis for paying a dowry. In the time of these laws and customs, the dowry seemed to be a measure the groom was capable of looking after themselves, for the father of the bride to set up the bride and groom (as usually they were between 12 and 20 years old when getting married) and for the bride to have a contingency fund should she need a divorce or was to be widowed.

There are three main words used regarding dowries I can find reference to:

Mundr - This is the only instance I could find a reference in a saga and not a lawbook, however the translation can be quite demeaning. The word meaning payment and brides being described as “bought and paid for”: mundi keypt

“So Sigurd waxed in King Hjalprek's house, and there was no child but loved him; through him was Hjordis betrothed to King Alf, and jointure meted to her.”

“Sigurðr óx þar upp með Hjálpreki, ok unni hvert barn honum. Hann fastnaði Álfi konungi Hjördísi ok mælti henni mund.” - Volsunga Saga, Chapter 13, Bellows Translation.

In the context of the use of the word, one would assume that it is the price from the groom to the family of the bride.

Heimanferð - This word seems to be used more frequently, however the mentions are more in relation to the handling of the dowry paid by the father to the groom. In Guta Lag, there are multiple references to this and how to handle it after the groom passes on, but also the handling of livestock portions of dowry. In Grágás the only mention of dowries I could find was regarding the settlement of debts and how the dowry could not be touched unless the wife willingly entered into debt along with her husband.

Haim Fylgi - This is the closest I could see to something customary, and more akin to a gift than a price tag. This portion of the dowry was given by either the groom or the brides closest kin to the bride. Depending on the mention, this was an advance on her inheritance, a substitute for it, or an outright gift. Has multiple variations, but found in Grágás, Guta Lag, Jónsbók, The Frostathing Law, The Younger Law of the Västgötar and The Older Law of the Västgötar.

What does this mean for us in today's world? Well, nothing. At least in the UK.

These laws and the custom seemed to serve as a means of ensuring a family didn’t starve should something befall the legal head of the house, and the laws are incredibly out of place for our world. In the UK a widow (of any gender) is entitled to a bereavement support payment immediately after their spouses passing, and are usually the recipient of the widowers pension pot. Our society has now advanced enough that a practice that could very well offend one party serves no spiritual, legal or functional purpose is out of place.

What seems to have happened with the spiritual bloggers is they have picked up references from reenactment and history pages that haven’t stated their sources and ran with it instead of checking up on the origins of where all of this has come from. This could be an innocent mistake, or it could be “shock” value of these blogs to attract more readers as the more fringe acts come with an air of “authenticity”.

This is with one exception. The giving of Haim Fylgi is the only part of all of this that can serve as a spiritual bonding, with the caveat it serves only as a gift and not a payment. In this, it fulfils the “gift-givers’ friendship”:

“Friends shall gladden each other | with arms and garments,

As each for himself can see;

Gift-givers' friendships | are longest found,

If fair their fates may be.” - Hávamál Stanza 41, Bellows Trans.

23/08/2024

An interesting snippet of history in the surrounding area of Weddings at Comrie Croft that caught my eye during wedding planning.

In the late 800s, the Ua Ímair (Ivar the Boneless' dynasty in Dublin) was becoming largely unstable. Two rival Irish Kings of Breda and Leinster saw an opportunity in the rise of Ímair Ua Ímair (son of Bardur Ivarsson) and seized Dublin, exiling him and his brother along with their retinue.

Forced to retreat to lands held in Scotland, and presumably penniless to establish another settlement, Ímair was likely forced to raid more locally than it was wise to.

Ímair went forth and started skirmishing with Constantine II of Scotland, leading to a raid on Dunkeld.

It's not clear whether Ímair over wintered in Dunkeld, or the skirmishes continued for another year before Ímair and one of his brothers were felled in the Battle of Strathearn by the Fortriu from the North.

This led to 50 years of peace from viking skirmishes on mainland Scotland. And so happens to be at least within 30 miles of our wedding venue!

22/08/2024

A Name

I don’t think I need to go into depth about the importance of ancestor worship in Germanic Paganism, and if you wish to delve into that then I would suggest reading The Road to Hell: A Study of the Conception of the Dead in Old Norse Literature.

Instead I will be dialling into one aspect of a ritual you may want to include in your marriage ceremony. I am going to give a quick overview of Uþal and how it relates to customs such as expanding your family via marriage or birth.

When you look up this concept, you may find more references to land inheritance and connections with legendary rulers or gods. By declaring your lineage going back 3, 6 or 9 generations back, you solidify your claim or land or rulership (See runestones U 130, Sö 145, Sm 71, Hs 14, and Sö 176). However there is an element here in which I would like to discuss, Hamingja.

By calling back on ancestral lineage, they didn’t just call upon a memorised family tree to prove legitimacy but to invoke the reputation of those invoked to backup their claim, or as some could characterise it as inciting the luck or hamingja those recited worked to cultivate in their lifetimes. In fact we see this sort of invocation throughout the sagas and poems throughout Germanic Paganism. The attestations are mostly of naming rituals, or Ausa Vatni, but not limited to.

In Vatnsdæla, Chapter 7, it states: “Thorstein had a son by his wife, and, when the boy was born, he was brought to his father. Thorstein looked at him and said: ‘That boy shall be named Ingimund, after the father of his mother, and I expect him to be lucky on account of his name.”

In Svarfdæla, Chapter 5 Thórólf says to his brother, Thorstein, to name his future son after him before dying: “... I want thee to give him the name of Thórólf, and all the luck which I have had I will give to him…”

Even in Beowulf, the second sentence we see him utter he invokes his fathers prowess: “and owe allegiance to Lord Hygelac.

In his day, my father was a famous man,

a noble warrior-lord named Ecgtheow.

He outlasted many a long winter

and went on his way. All over the world

men wise in counsel continue to remember him.”

Now let’s focus on that last one a little, and I’ll begin to speculate. Beowulf never outright states luck, but we can infer it as his fathers reputation as a warrior that he is invoking that reputation for himself to add foundation for his later claims of personal prowess, getting his foot in the door with the name of his father in order to rend his own services as a warrior. Which would prove successful with Hrothgar's recognition later on:

"I used to know him when he was a young boy. His father before him was called Ecgtheow. Hrethel the Geat gave Ecgtheow his daughter in marriage. This man is their son, here to follow up an old friendship.”

The combination of declaration and acknowledgement could be set aside as a simple proceeding between nobles and “not that deep”, but the importance of names and lineage across many sources would pull weight into the significance.

I could (And plan to at some point) go into more detail about all the sources around names and reciting of, but what does this mean now? Where does this recital fit into our world where we may not be know or be proud of our genetic lineage, where many of us don’t have direct royal lines?

The names we invoke are a reflection of the very person we want to be presented as. An aspiring warrior will call upon the names of warriors within their ancestry. One on a quest for wisdom will call upon the wisest of them. Someone who seeks renown, would recite the name of those who had already earned it. This does not need to be family though. Our ancestors were not shy of fostering and those bonds may have proved stronger than that of blood. You can call upon the names of those who have inspired you to be the person you are today, dead or alive, honouring them as your spiritual ancestors.

In reciting the names of those we have lost, and the ones who contributed to our very being, they never truly leave us:

Cattle die, | and kinsmen die,

And so one dies one's self;

But a noble name | will never die,

If good renown one gets. - Havamal 77, Bellows Translation

In a wedding, I believe a good time to recite would be when the parties arrive at the Ve for the ceremony, declaring who they are and who they are from to invoke the luck accumulated by that line in order to weave it with the others. This, I believe, would bind the families together in Hamingja and fate.

As I write this, Asatru UK are at The Great Heathen Gathering, preparing to consecrate the godpost of the keeper of our ancestors Hel. While I am not able to attend myself, I hope those that are will have the memories of absent friends in their hearts, and maybe recite their names so they may never die.

13/08/2024

Now for the main event, the reason there is a wedding in the first place and why there’s calling of witnesses from friends and family to gods themselves. Oaths.

The legality of oaths is still prevalent today within our sectors of government such as the House of Commons and the courts, with consequences still being severe in some cases. In antiquity and Heathenry there is another aspect of this practice though. Entwined with the legality is the oath's deep connection to your virðing and hamingja, honour and luck respectively, with the more impactful oaths bolstering them and breaking an oath drastically eroding them.

I would always suggest to anyone making any oath to consider the wording carefully. Gods are seen as breaking oaths in the Eddas, however these cases are met with mild ridicule to an arm being bitten off. For mortals, the price may have been more drastic:

“Then second I rede thee, | to swear no oath
If true thou knowest it not;
Bitter the fate | of the breaker of troth,
And poor is the wolf of his word.” - Sigrdrífumál Stanza 23, Bellows Translation.

Interestingly, the Icelandic of that stanza uses the word “Vargr” for wolf, related to outlawry where one would be sentenced to live outside of society. Obviously, we are beyond that point in modern times, however breaking an oath could see you unwelcome in certain circles as they do not want to be associated with someone with no integrity.

Oaths in Ancient Germanic Society is a huge subject, with many great authors and academics that have written extensively into the subject, but what does it mean for you?

Think deeply about what you intend to oath at your wedding, is it manageable? Is it reasonable? What are the impacts of not being able to hold to it? While this is a celebrants page, I would like to point out divorce is very much allowed in Heathenry, but in my view the oath needs to allow for it. Some couples may opt to put a time limit on the oath and renew them periodically. Some may put a condition in which the oath becomes null.

However you want to go about declaring your oaths is up to you, and I’ll happily be there to guide and advise you in writing them if you’re unsure.

Sylwia and I are writing our oaths separately, but we have both agreed to including a single line:

“Until the last ‘I love you’”.

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