Kohlweg Comedy

06/11/2024

06/11/2024

Asked this German girl for her number, I'm still waiting for the rest of it, so far all I got was 9..

01/11/2024

F**k me they like Halloween in this country! They're all at it!
Last Halloween in the UK we had 4 rain soaked harry potters with an Asda bag of digestive biscuits.... LIKE A PROPER COUNTRY

30/10/2024

I think one of the most amazing displays of democracy in history is that one thousand islands managed to come together and agree on a single dressing.

30/10/2024

Black tie gala at the silicon valley capital club

25/10/2024

I don't know for sure if Ben likes men, but there are signs...

24/10/2024

Don't "good morning" me!
You have no idea of the quality of this morning. You could be handing me a totally s**t morning and passing it off as a good one.
You're like the used car salesman of mornings. We don't trust you!

11/10/2024

British beef in California

03/10/2024

Who do you say "boss" with a Boston accent?

03/10/2024

There's a deodorant called Arctic Edge....
Why do women get to smell like lavinder and cherry blossom, while I've got to walk about smelling of the concept of adventure 🤷🤦‍♂️

03/10/2024

Give her the Medal! 🏅

02/10/2024

I'm sliding increasingly obvious fitness references into every professional email I send

30/09/2024

It's amazing how many step mothers can get stuck on all fours in a washing machine. There's literally hundreds of videos showing this exact problem...

26/09/2024

My Italian grandmother told me that when you cant sleep at night, theres a spiritual reason. She told me a fable all to do with how the energy of the forest can effect the darkness of the sky and even the rhythm of your heart. How your soul is always in sync with your surroundings.

My German grandfather told me that when you can't sleep at night it's because you are awake...
Germans don't f**k around.

24/09/2024

In my down time i like to noodle around on the PS5. I've just collected
"slag deposits" and I'll never be mature enough to not find that funny 🤭

18/09/2024

My patrick Stewart impression got me kicked out of the star trek fan club.
Hoisted by my own Picard..

17/09/2024

My whole life, situations have either underwhelmed me or overwhelmed me.
I've never been sufficiently whelmed..