06/26/2025
It’s a little toasty 🥵outside!
Today in Indiana: A Marginal Chance of Severe Storms... and a Guaranteed Descent Into Moist, Sweaty Madness.
Well folks, it’s another day in the Midwest’s Grand Sauna of Regret, where the Storm Prediction Center has graced us with a Marginal Risk (1/5) for severe weather for half the class. The Northern half. That’s meteorologist-speak for “meh, maybe you’ll get flattened by a rogue thunderstorm, maybe you’ll just stew in your own bodily fluids.” Either way, you lose. From Indy to the Michigan border, the sky might develop some mild anger issues this afternoon - like a toddler with a melted rocket pop.
That's in addition to the "ugh".
What's the "ugh"? Well, it's gross, and it's smothering the entire state.
Temps will soar into the mid to upper 90s with heat indices clawing toward 100°, which is ideal if you enjoy that slow-cooked rotisserie chicken experience. You’ll sweat in places you forgot existed. You’ll question your life choices. And if you even think about arguing with someone today, remember: this is the kind of heat that turned Anakin Skywalker into Darth Vader.
Rain? Oh yes, there’s a chance. But like every ex who ever said, “We’ll see,” it’s noncommittal and wildly disappointing.
Statewide, some pop-up storms could muscle their way into your afternoon, but the greatest risk for one maybe tossing a trash can into your windshield for flair will exist north of I-70. Weak shear, steep lapse rates, and some "leftover boundaries" (a.k.a. atmospheric bad decisions) could trigger isolated wind damage, but don’t get excited - it’s still mostly just hot, angry soup out there.
So grab your sunscreen, electrolytes, a portable fan, and, for heaven’s sake, double up on the deodorant. Because today isn’t about comfort, it’s about survival with dignity.
After an AM trip to Walmart to grab a case of bottled water, this writer can tell you with certainty that dignity seems to be on roll back. Oh yes. We're judging.
As always.
Stay aware. Stay safe. And don't get twisted!
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