09/22/2023
Each. Other.
Loving each other starts with seeing each other.
The thing that makes relationships so challenging is that we are each “other.” Each of us is unique. Everyone else is other. Until we learn to see each other person as truly “other” than us, we will not honor the dignity of their existence.
If I see Traci as “my wife” I am only seeing her in relation to me. She is an accessory. Like my coat, my car and my cat. This way of seeing is natural, since I relate to the world from where I am. I only see through my own eyes. But it hurts our relationship because I don’t really see “her”. I merely see how she relates to me.
My children are individuals in their own right. Each is other than me, other than Traci and other than each other. Each is other than every other person on earth.
Yet, somehow we share many things in common. We were each created in the image of the Creator who is totally other yet expressed in each.
As a Christian, I believe the very nature of God is each other. Three persons each other than the others are inextricably bound in a common-unity of oneness. This oneness is not threatened by the otherness of each other, but is enhanced by it and finds its full expression in it.
The relationships we were designed for mirror this existential reality at the heart of our humanity.
The first step in loving each other is to see each other.
I was recently certified in SYMBIS (Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts). It’s a great tool for helping couples see each other. If you know someone getting married that wants to take the assessment and do some counseling, send them my way. It works great for marriage tune ups too!
Sign up link in bio.