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Quarter Acoustic Music Club events, Limekilnburn Road, Hamilton (2024)

07/12/2024

For your entertainment this coming tuesday is another of our world famous singers nights which will be the last club event until January 21st when it will be another singers night then on January 28th it will be our Burns night - not the type where you get 1st or 3rd degree burns and then sit for 10 hours in A&E but where you can if you want get to eat one of the haggis from the last three weeks or so posts, or should it be haggii, with neaps and tatties
There's a possibility there may be some Christmas songs this Tuesday which may include The Little Drummer boy. After hours researching this song I discovered in those days banjos existed and were, just like today an instrument of ridicule and liked as much as cyclists dressed in lycra in a group of 20 hogging the road and going up a hill at 2mph while you are behind them with a car full of kids with them shouting are we there yet every 10 seconds.
Anyway back to the little drummer boy who was actually little banjo boy until a camel broke it in two and there weren't any music shops in Bethlehem and he couldn't ask Ian Walker to borrow his as he was doing a gig at the Boolin club. Being an intelligent lad he then invented the drum with what was left over from his banjo. I never thought of that while I was doing my instruments on a budget posts.

Now for the serious stuff. In the song the Magi summoned him to the nativity of Jesus but he didn't have a gift so instead of playing his banjo he played his drum with the approval of Mary who actually fell out with Joseph for the reason in the second picture which in actual fact is where the song Silent Night came from, Jesus apparently smiled at him. It's all true!!! I,ve researched it on Facebook so it must be true.
Anyway the song was written by the well known American composer Katherine Kennicott Davis in 1941.
Now for another amazing fact it was first recorded in 1951 by the Austrian Trapp family who were in the Sound of Music which will probably be repeated again somewhere over the Christmas period. The song has been recorded many times since.

Anyway did I say this Tuesday is the last event until January 21st next year?
Come on down sing a song, (possibly the little drummer boy but don't all come and sing it as it would be a bit monotonous), recite a poem dance a jig or just sit and be entertained and don't forget there will be another of our world famous raffles at the Boolin club Limekilnburn Road Quarter ML3 7XA doors open 7.30 for 8pm start

30/11/2024

This coming Tuesday the 3rd of December at the Boolin club we have for your entertainment one of our world famous singers nights where you can sing a song, recite a poem, dance a jig or just come and relax and be entertained.
A while back I was asked if a strip tease is allowed but after consultation with the steering committee computer said no. So the other day the same member asked about pole dancing but if it's what I'm thinking I said I doubt it but I will ask. But if it is a troupe of east Europeans then I would think its ok.

Anyway I came across this piechart of ways people met their maker in English folk songs. I tried to search for the Scottish equivalent unsuccessfully and I did come across this photo and wondered if anyone had actually written a song or even a poem about it. The only other Scottish deaths I could think of in song was drowning in the river clyde. No doubt some of the members will right me by telling me there are hundreds of songs.

Anyway did I say this coming Tuesday we have a singers night along with our world famous raffle at The Boolin Club, Limekilnburn Road, Quarter, ML3 7XA doors open 7.30 for 8pm start

21/11/2024

For your entertainment this coming Tuesday 26th November you are in for a right treat we have the brilliant John Goldie who will astonish you with his mastery of the guitar and amaze you with tales from his career travels.
When he was last here 2 years ago we didn't really know what to expect but he gave an absolute masterclass on his guitar which enthralled the club many of whom kept asking when he would return. I was the mc that night and this coming Tuesday it will be John Malcolm

Anyway following on from last weeks true tale about the wild haggis marriage ceremony I have added to it with a poem I wrote about an angler catching Nessie and a haggis begging him to let her go. This may or may not turn into a song if I can come up with some sort of fitting melody.

Upon Loch Ness, the waters deep,
An angler cast, with patience steep,
The line went taut, a mighty pull,
And from the depths, so dark and full,
A creature rose with ancient grace
It was Nessie, wow, the anglers face!

By his side came a haggis small,
With pleading eyes and furred form tall,
"Let her go," the haggis cried,
"Release the beast from this cruel ride
She’s not for catching today by you
Let her return to waters blue."

The angler paused, his heart was stirred,
But greed soon spoke, I'll be famous he purred.
"I've caught a legend, wild and grand,
The ancient tales now in my hand.
But you, small creature, what are you?
A snack, perhaps, to chew and stew."

I,m a haggis sir "I am no prize,
Not meant to end in cruel demise.
A creature lost, but not yet caught,
My life’s a gift, not yours for sport.
Please, let her go, I’ll beg and plead,
Please let her go then feast on me."

The angler smiled, but deep inside,
He felt a shift he couldn't hide.
He let them both slip back away
A rare, strange moment, wild and free.
And in the mist, a quiet vow
The Loch still holds its secrets now.

Anyway did I say this coming Tuesday we have for your entertainment the brilliant John Goldie? Also there will be our world famous raffle and floor spots I wonder if anyone will be brave enough to bring their guitar? Of course they will.
Don't be late at the Boolin club Limekilnburn Road Quarter ML3 7XA doors open 7.30 for 8pm start

13/11/2024

This coming Tuesday 19th November we have one of our world famous singers nights plus a half spot from an artist. The musical artist not the one who paints bowls of fruit or flowers as this would probably be boring and would risk the club emptying at half time.
This Tuesday we have the talented Dave Mason who will entertain us with a variety of songs some of them will possibly be from when he lived in South Africa and America. As well as being an excellent singer songwriter guitarist he is also very accomplished on the pipes. Bagpipes not the plumbing ones. For more information about Dave visit his website davemason.co.uk

Now for a change from my usual making a musical instrument on a budget.
An article on Scotlands rarely seen wild haggis which is as true as the Loch Ness Monster.

One of the stranger consequences of the Scots ceasing to eat wild Haggis and for what is eaten now on Burns suppers was the introduction of "Haggis Weddings." An unmarried woman would compete in a series of events to win the right to marry a Giant Kilmarnock Haggis for a period of one calendar year.
The woman and the Haggis would hold a copy of the haggis recipe and recite a short verse by William McGonagall, watched by three officials (one for the Lowlands, one for the Highlands and one for the Islands.)
A specially distilled Speyside Wedding Whisky was then drunk by the guests who would toast the bride and groom before a feast of locally sourced smoked fish.

After the ceremony the Haggis would live with the woman and her family for six months, followed by the woman living with the wild Haggis and his family for the remaining six months. This cultural exchange was viewed as a great honour and the waiting list for entrants to the selection contests often resembled the birth marriage and deaths column in a newspaper from the time of the great plague. The tradition of the Haggis Wedding continued until the late 1800's when Queen Victoria thought it unseemly to have one of her subjects live in a forest for six months. This is where her famous saying came from "we are not amused"

Before anyone asks, the poem has not survived as far as I can tell, which for anyone who has read McGonagall's works can only be seen as a blessing.

Below is believed to be the only surviving photograph of the ceremony.

Anyway did I say this coming Tuesday will be a singers come half spot session with guest Dave Mason plus our world famous raffle. For the first half come and sing a song, play a tune recite a poem but after seeking guidance from the steering committee doing a strip tease is not allowed.
All welcome at the Boolin club Limekilnburn Road Quarter ML3 7XA doors open 7.30 for 8pm start

27/10/2024

Where to start?
This coming Tuesday 29th October we have one of our world famous singers nights where you can sing a song, recite a poem dance a jig don't know if a strip tease is allowed but no-one has told me yet that you can't but that might change. If you like you can come and be entertained and do nothing.
Not only that but after teething problems mainly to do with the boolin club telly we are now going to see the premiere of the latest Netflix sensation Erchie Cathcairt starring Davy McNab and directed by Jack Foley. So to guarantee a seat come early as queues are expected to go the length of Limekilnburn Road and possibly most of the way to Hamilton.

Now time for our regular feature of making a musical instrument on a budget and this week it's that instrument where neighbours get up a petition to have practising musicians of this particular instrument removed from their area.
It is of course the one which is mandatory to wear a kilt when performing - The bagpipes. Not sure why you have to wear a kilt but it is a popular thing with the ladies who stand close to the piper with their highly polished shoes and just look down at their feet all the time.
Anyway let's get back to how to make bagpipes on a budget.
You will need a polythene bag, some tape, 2 recorders and some biros less the writing bit.
See the below picture and if you get a fancy polythene bag you can make the instrument look like the one in the other picture
Tape 2 pens together for blowing into then tape to the plastic bag.
At the top of the bag insert a recorder so the mouthpiece is covered up and tape to seal it this will be the drone. Tape some of the holes in the drone to get the excruciating sound you want.
On the same side as the blow pipe at the bottom of the bag attach another recorder which will act as the chanter and tape to seal it.
Play this like you would a school recorder but don't play 3 blind mice instead learn to play something like Scotland the brave or Flower of Scotland.
Check for leaks anywhere then tape up to seal.
Now go and learn how to play it so it makes a noise which sounds like a tomcat with its bits caught on a barbwire fence. Then see how quickly your neighbours get a petition up to get you removed from your neighbourhood when you are practising playing.
I would suggest not practising at home but go into the centre of Edinburgh or Glasgow and put a hat on the floor where shopkeepers will throw money into it in the hope you will go and stand somewhere else.

Anyway did I say this coming Tuesday it will be one of our world famous singers nights along with the world premiere of Erchi Cathcairt. Hopefully after these last few weeks some of you will turn up with some of these instruments I have given you instructions to make at the Boolin club Limekilnburn Road Quarter ML3 7XA doors open 7.30 for 8pm start.

20/10/2024

This coming Tuesday 22nd October we have for your entertainment Pauline Vallance.
Most of you will have seen her perform so you know what to expect. Or do you? For those who have never seen Pauline perform you are in for a treat.
For more about this very popular performer check out her website. paulinevallance.co.uk

Right it's time for that part of my regular feature on making musical instruments on a budget and as Pauline plays a clarsach it would be fitting to make one of these but a little bit cheaper than the cost of the real thing.
After this tutorial I would expect the floorspots this Tuesday to make and bring their own.
Start by getting some pieces of wood and make an isosceles triangle shape.
For those of you who were wagging school or were asleep during maths lessons there is a picture of one below.
Or, for those of you who are quite adept at woodworking copy the one below.
Then get some different coloured elastic bands and spread them across your masterpiece with different tensions for different notes. There you are that was easy wasn't it.
Next spend years learning how to play it and watching old Marx brothers films before daring to perform in public. Tuesdays floorspots exempt.

You heard it here first the next Netflix sensation Erchie Cathcairt is going to premiere at the next singers night providing the boolin club telly plays ball. Queues for this premiere are expected to go the length of Limekilnburn Road and possibly most of the way to Hamilton so come early.

Did I say Pauline Vallance will be performing at the Boolin club, Limekilnburn Road, Quarter ML3 7XA this coming Tuesday? Along with floorspots and our world famous raffle, doors open 7.30 for 8pm start.

13/10/2024

This coming Tuesday 15th October for your entertainment we have Fil Campbell and Tom McFarland over from the Emerald Isle. The last time they were here they thrilled us with their tales and wonderful songs so get ready for another great night. For more information about them visit their website filandtom.com Below is a photo of them going on the scenic route to Quarter

Have you ever wanted to play the intro to Gerry Rafferties Baker Street or Lulu and David Bowie,s version of The man who sold the world?
Here is the perfect instrument to do it the saxophone.
But of course why spend hundreds of pounds when you can make one yourself by using a few items everyone has in their kitchen or rather under their sink.
Start by removing the sink wastepipe and u bend and just put them together as in the photo below. Also you will want an old funnel to look the part. To make it even better drill a few holes in the wastepipe for different notes but don't forget to tape over them when you get back from one of our world famous singers nights or your kitchen will get flooded as it also might if you forget to tell your other half you have borrowed a few things from under the sink unless your other half is coming with you.
As these kitchen items can be a bit smelly and you don't want anyone sat near you at a singers night thinking you have a bad case of halitosis I would recommend giving them a good clean with bleach or something.
One other thing is they tend to fill up with water from condensation from your breath so don't blow too hard as you have the equivalent of a super soaker and no-one wants their drinks topping up with water and bleach.
As with most of my instruments it is easy to make them look better so with a few embellishments and a coat of gold paint you will easily be able to create the one I made earlier in the other photo below.

I was recently asked to put my name to these posts but rather than that I will make this into a competition so who guesses who I am will win the star prize of buying a round of drinks for everyone in the Boolin club the next singers night.

Anyway did I say this coming Tuesday we will be entertained by Fil Campbell and Tom McFarland along with our world famous floor spots and raffle?
Come on down to The Boolin club, Limekilnburn Road, Quarter ML3 7XA doors open 7.30 for 8pm start

04/10/2024

This coming Tuesday 8th October for your entertainment we have the ever popular Robin Laing aka The Whiskey Bard. Check out his website for loads of information about him robinlaing.com. It's sure to be another brilliant night. Here is a photo of him performing here a couple of years ago.

Right it's time for another installment of making your own instruments on a budget. I was going to do the triangle but apart from it making a ting at the end of the song and sometimes at the beginning it's pretty useless unless you are a raving lunatic built like a brick shxxhouse reading this then it's a brilliant instrument.
So after hours of research I came up with the cymbal which has many uses including self defence against triangle players. I remember my grandmother telling me of how my grandfather used to fight with a cymbal aka a dustbin lid. Not sure I understood how this was a weapon but apparently it was lethal back in the early 1900s.
Anyway back to the cymbal. The easiest way of making them is getting difficult as the old dustbin lids were made perfect as budget cymbals even having handles for each hand see pictures. Unfortunately there's not many around nowdays with the advent of wheelie bins which don't have handles and don't sound so good when banged together. At a push metal saucepan lids will do or even the ends of oil drums with handles glued to the ends. That's if you come across a spare one after last weeks article on afro carribean steel drums.
To play these cymbals every now and again clang them together as you sing a song. However if you aren't a sociable person at singers nights they are brilliant for you as no-one will sit anywhere near you unless they are completely deaf.
If it's your round at the bar they come in handy for carrying drinks back to your mates. If you are feeling mischievous sneak up behind someone and drop one on the floor which is guaranteed to make him or her jump.
They also make good frisbees but make sure there's no one around as you could accidently remove someone's head from their body.
I will leave it up to your imagination of the uses this versatile instrument has. The best use someone comes up with will win the star prize of getting a round of drinks in for the whole club.

Anyway did I say Robin Laing will be entertaining us this coming Tuesday 8th October along with floorspots and our world famous raffle at Quarter Acoustic Music Club, The Boolin club Limekilnburn Road Quarter ML3 7XA doors open 7.30 for 8pm start

25/09/2024

Well after 3 Tuesdays of excellent entertainment from The Quiggs, Paul Walker and Karen Pfeiffer and Bass and Taylor this coming Tuesday 1st October is time to get your tonsils lubricated and get ready to perform at one of our world famous singers nights. Unfortunately Vincent Morgan was due to do a half set but has had to cancel so it will be a normal singers night.
Also there is news on the world premiere of Erchi Cathcairt which will now be shown on Tuesday the 29th October singers night. As it is an unticketed event you you will be able to join the queue to get into Boolin club which will probably stretch the length of Limekilnburn Road and possibly the whole way into Hamilton.

Now you will all be looking forward to one of my masterclasses on making your own instruments on a budget. So here is how to make one of those afro carribean steel drums where you will be able to take it to a multitude of beaches to entertain all those who just want a quiet afternoon in the sun. Yes I said Sun and in Scotland too. Well a slight exaggeration.
Here are the instructions starting with picture 1 and when finished it might look like picture 2 which is me performing at Prestwick beach with Ailsa Craig in the background. Look at my suntan aka rust from the old oil drum.
1. Find an empty old oil drum as a full one is likely to cause an oil slick similar to the one caused by the Torry Canyon all those years ago and people swimming in the sea won't be happy.
2. Cut the top off the bottom of the empty drum about a foot deep. Sorry don't do centimetres and as its in feet I didn't mean centipedes either.
3. With a big hammer bash the top into a concave shape.
4. File the bottom of the drums edges smooth so that if you want to play it on your knees and you start banging away on the finished article it won't cut your legs off.
5. Spend 2 weeks continuously polishing the finished drum so you get a shiny surface.
6. Spend 5 minutes learning how to play it then take it to the beach. Don't forget your hat to collect all the donations you will receive.

Anyway did I say there will be one of our world famous singers nights this Tuesday? Come along sing a song, recite a poem play a tune on your new steel drum you've just made while dancing a jig or just come and be entertained at The Boolin Club, Limekilnburn Road, Quarter, ML3 7XA doors open 7.30 for 8pm start

22/09/2024

This coming Tuesday 24th September we have for your entertainment Bass and Taylor. Some of you will remember them as Two Coats Colder and is it as long ago as 2020 that they all performed here? Doesn't time fly? They were excellent then and you will be in for a treat again. Ray has very kindly sent me the following photo and information about themselves which is really appreciated as I,ve just moved house. If you want more information about them here is the link to their website
www.bassandtaylor.co.uk

Anyway as you all know and are expecting with baited breath (sounds like you've been at the Danish blue cheese) here is another installment on musical instruments. I was going to do one on violins but thought better of it as the last time I played mine I got a visit from the the SSPCA when one of the neighbours thought I was torturing a cat by hanging it by its bits on a barbed wire fence. Moving into a new neighbourhood I didn't want that to happen again

So then I thought Accordions and concertinas but I will have to do more research on how to build a diy one.
In the meantime I did find a great use for one in case you need to blow up your car tyres see picture below.
The other use is playing the theme to my hero Captain Pugwash. Might just ask a request to Alan Jones if he isn't too busy blowing up flat tyres whilst playing What shall we do with a drunken sailor.

Anyway did I say Bass and Taylor will be entertaining us this coming Tuesday along with our world famous raffle and floor spots. Doors open 7.30 for 8pm start The Boolin club, Limekilnburn Road, Quarter ML3 7XA

11/09/2024

After seeing the Quiggs perform on tuesday can the acts at Quarter get any better?
Coming up next Tuesday 17th September we have Paul Walker and Karen Pfeiffer which will be another brilliant nights entertainment
For those of you who want to know more about them head on over to their web page www.paulwalkermusic.co.uk
Here is a synopsis about them.
They are an Anglo/German duo from staffordshire (the clue is in the picture of the pottery kilns). Here they are seen doing their imitation of the pied piper of Hamlin but instead of leading hundreds of rats from the town they are leading the entire duck population (what is left of them after the rats ate the rest) down to the local canal. Most likely their photo shoot for their album Auf Wiedersein me duck.

Anyway I am going to do another article on another instrument after the success of the previous ones the banjo and the ukulele. Having seen Karen playing the flute I thought why not, so after hours and hours of research I came up with another how to make an instrument.
Please note with a little decoration the finished article will look like in the picture of the young girl playing it. Note how it attracts loads of squirrels unlike a similar sounding instrument the dog whistle which only attracts angry dog owners trying to get their dogs to come back to them after you have scared them away.
Anyway here are the instructions
1. Get a piece of bamboo that is straight, as a curly one will look like a French horn when it's done
2. Make sure it is clear inside and leave the end on unless you want it to double up as a pea shooter.
3. Drill a few holes in it (6) starting around an inch from the end then evenly apart then another for the mouth hole at the other end.
4. Sandpaper it or you might end up with splinters in your mouth.
5. Learn to play it.
Easy songs include Beethovens Moonlight Sonato or his Fur Elise going on to much harder songs like Twinkle twinkle little star or even Mary had a little lamb.

Anyway did I say Paul Walker and Karen Pfeiffer will be entertaining us this coming Tuesday along with floorspots and our world famous raffle? Your host for the evening will be Neil Dawson.
Come on down to The Boolin club Limekilnburn Road Quarter ML3 7XA doors open 7.30 for 8pm start

05/09/2024

This coming Tuesday 10th September we have the Quiggs to perform for us.
I was going to post their bio but have you seen how long it is?
Instead, seeing as you found this page and you want to know about them go on to their web page like I just did. There you will find out all about them as if you haven't already seen them perform like most of us have and if you haven't come along and you are in for a treat.
Anyway I did notice something of interest in their bio was how Stephen ended up with Pernille and I more or less quote :- It was from Denmark on a viking raid that he brought with him home his future wife Pernille. Now I,m not up on viking raids as such but I,ve a feeling they were something like in cavemen times when one or the other got clubbed over the head and got dragged home.
Due to pc restrictions nowadays I can't say it was the bloke who clubbed the young lady over the head and even saying this may result in a Facebook ban. Sorry Mark Zukum zookumburg or whatever your name is.
Anyway below is a nice picture of them together. And for those who saw last weeks post about how to make a banjo I,m wondering if Stephen will heed my instructions and turn up with a homemade one.

Anyway back to last weeks post. I did sort of promise you what to do with your old ukulele after you had used part of it to make a banjo.

1. Wall art. Turn it into a piece of art by painting it and decorating it with decorations like that cannabis plant. See picture
2. Flower pot. Use the body of the broken ukulele as a unique planter by filling it with soil and adding small plants leaving room for another cannabis plant.
3. Jewellery organiser. Hide all your valuables in the sound hole plus the cannabis seeds in case of burglary or a police raid.
4. Clock. Be unoriginal and shove a clock in the sound hole like everyone does with useless articles they don't want to throw away.
5. Birdhouse (see picture)
6. Mini bar. Probably a better use for it than actually playing it as an instrument of torture - see picture.
7. Sound experiment. Take it apart and use it to experiment with creating your own unique musical instruments which will probably sound better than the original.
8. If you can't be bothered just throw it in the bin or burn it.

Anyway did I say the Quiggs will be performing this coming Tuesday plus during the break you will be entertained with our world famous raffle and floor spots.
Come on down to The Boolin club, Limekilnburn Road, Quarter ML3 7XA doors open 7.30 for 8pm start

28/08/2024

This coming Tuesday September 3rd is our AGM starting at 7pm followed by one of our world famous singers nights starting at 8pm
Nothing much going off apart from that so here is an article about that popular misconstrued instrument the Banjo.

1 - How to make one on a budget

2 - Parts required
An old tambourine, an old broken ukulele neck some glue and some bits of string

3 - Instructions -an idea taken from IKEAs furniture building patterns.
Glue ukulele neck to tambourine tie bits of string to tambourine and thread through tuners. Depending on if you want a simple one or a blingy one all depends on your tambourine see finished pictures below. Notice the sophisticated strap on the blingy one from a left over piece of string.
NB a plank of wood with nails hammered at the end instead of tuners will do if you can't find an old ukulele.

4 - Tuning your finished banjo
Turn the tuners until you get a sound like a tomcat with its bits caught on a barbed wire fence.

Next in this educational series
What to do with the rest of the ukulele.

After this time consuming article I expect to see at least 3 of these at our singers night on Tuesday.
Did I say we were having one of our world famous singers nights this coming tuesday?
All welcome sing a song, recite a poem do a dance while playing a home made banjo or just come and be entertained
The Boolin Club, Limekilnburn Road Quarter ML3 7XA

21/08/2024

When it was announced we were having Skirlie this coming Tuesday 27th August I thought we were having a bowl of something resembling muesli and wondered who the artists would be to entertain us.
Seems there is another Skirlie featuring our sound man Kevin and some others. Just wondering what Rab is looking at instead of playing. Oi Rab we don't pay you to sit there doing nowt (Yorkshire slang meaning nothing). No matter what you will be well entertained with these multi instrumentalists who most of us have already seen and if you haven't seen them get down to the Boolin club as you are in for a treat. (again not the food stuff)
Anyway if you are wanting something to eat they don't serve Skirlie at the bar unless its the Skirlie who will be performing then as long as they pay for their drinks and snacks I suppose it will be alright for them to be served.

Anyway an update on Davy Mcnab who was allegedly kidnapped on his way back from the red carpet treatment in Hollywood for his part in the next Netflix sensation of Erchie Cathcairt which we still haven't seen due to not being able to connect to the Boolin clubs telly the other week.
It was nice to see him at the singers night after he made a dramatic escape so he says but I think its because we wouldn't have a raffle to pay for the ransom demands and they just got fed up of hearing him singing something about a gentlemans handkerchief so they dumped him into the back of their car and dropped him back home. He didn't say whether they looked in his pocket at his handkerchief or he would have had to walk home.
However there is a conspiracy theory that he couldn't perform his half set due to having some kind of man flu thingy which is too far fetched to believe.

Anyway did I say we were having the actual Skirlie perform for us and not the food thing. Come on down to the boolin club, Limekilnburn Road, Quarter, ML3 7XA
Doors open 7.30 for 8pm start

Quarter Acoustic Music Club events

07/12/2024

30/11/2024

21/11/2024

13/11/2024

27/10/2024

20/10/2024

13/10/2024

04/10/2024

25/09/2024

22/09/2024

11/09/2024

05/09/2024

28/08/2024

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