Legacy Celebrant

15/06/2024

On Thursday I had the honour of officiating the funeral for a 94 year old gentleman.

The process didn't start when he died. I met him and his daughters last year. He had a health scare and his family wanted to have a plan in place before he died.

In the absence of poems or readings that often a Celebrant will come armed with, we were treated to a video of him playing his mouth organ. On entering the chapel, along with the order of service, you received a Tunnocks Caramel Wafer.

One of his daughters delivered a heart warming tribute and gave thanks to those who had supported the family.

There was no lining up and shaking hands at the end, the congregation being told to head to the funeral tea. In the words of the deceased's "Otherwise it takes too bloody long to get out of here!"

We don't know when we will take out last breath, but we will. So, let's get our deaths out of the way so we can enjoy life!

If you'd like to have a Dead Good Conversation, please get in touch.

Thank you to Aberdeen Funeral Directors, Causewayend for your support.

12/06/2024

I spent a lovely afternoon at Haddo House NTS meeting with the events planner. I'm officiating a wedding in their magnificent library next month.

Haddo offers different packages for couples so if you are still looking for a venue in Aberdeenshire, why not check them out?

https://www.nts.org.uk/venue-hire/haddo-house

01/06/2024

Playful parenting is about making everyday moments with your kids fun. It means turning chores into games, using play to teach things like numbers, and finding creative ways to solve little problems. It’s about laughing together and building a strong connection. And it’s about letting kids make choices and explore, which helps them grow up confident and happy. It’s all about adding a little fun to the serious job of raising kids.

31/05/2024

The tradition of exchanging wedding rings dates back over 3,000 years to the ancient Egyptians. They revered the circle as a symbol of eternity, without start or finish, akin to the celestial bodies they worshipped. The gap in the centre symbolised a portal to life’s mysteries.

Recent research has uncovered that these early rings were often crafted from h**p and reed. These natural materials were intricately braided to form a durable ring that would maintain its shape on the finger. The Ouroboros, an image of a serpent consuming its own tail, was among their initial ring designs, symbolising life’s perpetual cycle.

The tradition of wedding rings changed over time. The Greeks and Romans transformed them into the gold and silver bands we know today. But it was not until World War II that men began to wear wedding rings to remember their wives.




Rings

30/05/2024

From the first breath to the first step, naming ceremonies mark the beginning of a new chapter. Whether celebrating the arrival of a newborn, welcoming an adopted child, changing one's name to align with one's gender, or introducing a furry friend to the family, each ceremony is a tapestry of personal stories and cultural traditions.

But it’s not just for humans! Boat naming, housewarmings, and even the inaugural launch of businesses are moments where names hold power and promise.

My business name was chosen because I would not have become a celebrant if my son hadn't died, so this is part of his Legacy.

29/05/2024

It's World Otter day!

This is celebrated on the last Wednesday of every May. So what's it all about? Read here

A day to celebrate and raise awareness for otters across the world.

29/05/2024

A menarche blessing honours the first blood of girls as they transition into womanhood in the "Maiden, Mother, Crone" trilogy.

This has been celebrated for generations in cultures all over the world but somewhere along the line, it has become a forgotten one, with the patriarchal society deeming menstrual blood sinful and shameful.

It’s a moment to gather, support, and empower as they begin their journey into womanhood. Let’s uplift and support our girls as they embrace this natural, affirming change.

28/05/2024

Jennifer and Brooklyn Celebrated their first anniversary on Friday. Their was held at the stunning in Aberdeenshire, which was chosen because Jennifer had an ancestral connection to the area.

I loved creating this ceremony with Jenn and Brooklyn, getting to know their amazing love story, and seeing them go from being just friends to collaborators for a lifetime and a lifetime more.

27/05/2024

This quote has been wrongly attributed to Winston Churchill.

However, these are words he DID speak in Dundee, on the 10th of October 1908:

‘What is the use of living, if it be not to strive for noble causes and to make this muddled world a better place for those who will live in it after we are gone? How else can we put ourselves in harmonious relation with the great verities and consolations of the infinite and the eternal? And I avow my faith that we are marching towards better days. Humanity will not be cast down. We are going on swinging bravely forward along the grand high road and already behind the distant mountains is the promise of the sun.’

What words have made an impact on your life? What mantras keep you going throughout your day?

24/05/2024

I cannot believe it is a year since I had the sheer honour and delight of wedding Jenn and Brooklyn! was their Fairytale venue for their .

Congratulations, ladies, and I look forward to seeing you on your next adventure to Scotland!

24/05/2024

Unless requested to wear a specific colour, it is hs become the norml to wear black or dark colours to funeral services.

This tradition is believed to date back to the Roman period when individuals would wear a dark toga (known as a toga pulla) after a person's death.

Queen Victoria's decision to wear only black after her husband's death in 1861 is thought to have inspired the tradition to become a rule of etiquette.

What would you have your loved ones wearing at your funeral, assuming you are having one?

22/05/2024

Your wedding rings are passed around your guests before your ceremony begins. This community event allows your nearest and dearest to imbue your wings with a prayer or blessing as they hold your rings in their hands for a few seconds. It is often called a ring-warming ritual.

21/05/2024

This celebration of life had many contributors, from his partner to his former employer, family and friends. Everyone had a story to share about "Popeye", a well-known and loved character.

I regard all ceremonies as a collaboration which I put together and bring to life. There were lots of laughs at this celebration of life, one I had the privilege to officiate.

20/05/2024

My road has had many twists, turns and obstacles to overcome. I have been jobless, homeless and penniless. I have been used, abused, bullied and beaten.

I thought my world had ended when my son died, but one thing I have learned is that life does go on. How you choose to lead that life is up to you.

I have survived, and now I choose to thrive.

18/05/2024

You can find out more about World Whisky Day here https://www.worldwhiskyday.com/

Remember to drink responsibly!

17/05/2024

According to https://www.bollywoodshaadis.com/articles/most-expensive-royal-weddings-from-spain-dubai-to-britain-the-royalties-set-the-bar-high-46973, the most expensive wedding ever came in at a staggering $137 USD!!! This was the royal Emirati wedding of Sheikha Hind Bint bin Maktoum to Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid Al Maktoum in Dubai.

The celebration lasted a week, and there were a lot of diamonds involved—and people. Imagine dealing with a guest list of 20,000.

According to Hitched, the average cost of a wedding in the UK in 2023 was £20,700. That's still a lot of pennies, but there are ways you can keep the costs down. But that's a post for another day!

16/05/2024

Read my blog here: https://www.legacycelebrant.org.uk/eco-wedding-essentials/ for ways to reduce your wedding's carbon footprint. Weddings don't have to cost the earth!

15/05/2024

Writing your wedding vows is a deeply personal and meaningful task. Here’s a guide to help you craft vows that reflect your love and commitment.

Reflect on Your Relationship
Think about your journey together. What are the defining moments of your relationship? Consider what you love most about your partner and why you choose to marry them.

Find Inspiration
Look for quotes, poems, or other works of literature that resonate with your feelings. Find examples on the internet, but do not copy them. They are not your vows.

Set the Tone
Decide on the tone of your vows. Do you want them to be heartfelt, serious, light-hearted, humorous, or a blend of these? Ensure that your partner is on the same page about the tone.

Make Promises
Vows are promises to your partner. Think about the commitments you want to make. These can range from everyday actions like always making coffee in the morning to more significant commitments like supporting each other through life’s challenges.

Structure Your Vows
You could start with a declaration of love, then move on to your promises and finish with a final vow. Aim for about one minute or less per vow. Ensure your and your partner’s vows are of similar length.

Practice Out Loud
Read your vows out loud to ensure they flow well. Practice will help you become more comfortable with the words and reduce nerves on the big day.

Get Feedback
If you’re comfortable, share your vows with a trusted person for feedback. They can provide insights and help polish your words.

Keep Them Safe
Ensure you have them ready for the ceremony and keep them safe. Share them with your celebrant.

14/05/2024

It was a pleasure working with Morag and her family to create a fitting send-off for her father. They were generous with their stories, and I easily captured the essence of her dad.

The family kept a vigil over the last days of his life and ensured a candle was burning in his room 24/7. When he died, the candle extinguished itself.

We created a ritual at his funeral, having a lit candle throughout, and Morag snubbed it out at the end of the ceremony.

13/05/2024

12/05/2024

It's Sunday, traditionally the day of rest.

What helps you relax? What's your nn negotiable?

11/05/2024

Every second Saturday in May, we celebrate World Fair Trade Day. This global event connects fair trade producers and customers, shining a spotlight on the transformative power of the Fair Trade business model.

Fair Trade is about ensuring that workers around the globe are treated fairly and have decent wages and working conditions. It's a fight against poverty, exploitation, and climate change.

This year, the campaign theme is . It serves as a global platform to raise awareness about Fair Trade principles and practices and promote social and economic justice.

By showcasing the success stories of Fair Trade Enterprises, we aim to inspire consumers, businesses, and policymakers to embrace Fair Trade as a powerful tool for creating a more equitable and sustainable world.

Join us in celebrating World Fair Trade Day, and let's start a !

Get involved here https://trello.com/b/TREFVYMJ/businessrevolution

10/05/2024

A casket has only 4 sides, while a coffin has 6. The word coffin is derived from the Greek word kophinos, which means basket and was first coined by the French.

The earliest evidence of wooden coffin remains, dated to 5000 BC, was found in Tomb 4 at Beishouling, Shaanxi, China.

Some Aboriginal peoples still use primitive wooden coffins, which are made from a tree trunk split down the centre and hollowed out.

In the Christian era, stone coffins came into use. Romans who were rich enough had their coffins made of limestone brought from Assus in Asia Minor.

It wasn't until the American Civil War began in 1861 that coffins were widely used. Using them to transport dead soldiers safely and securely, Americans started to mass produce the coffin we know today.

Coffins have evolved over time, are made of different materials, and often reflect cultural practices, beliefs about the afterlife, and even social status. You can even buy coffins made from upcycled pallets and flat-packed for self-assembly.

However, you don’t need to use a coffin, but that is a post for a different day!

09/05/2024

I love this story! Names have been changed.

Deborah and Sean have been together for over five years. Deborah owns her home, while Sean has been living with his mother, Rose, since his father died seven years ago. Although Deborah has asked Sean to move in with her multiple times, Sean always joked that he would do so when they got married, despite knowing Deborah wasn’t interested in marriage.

During Sunday dinner, Rose asked Deborah when she would be taking Sean off her hands. Sean again mentioned marriage, but this time, Deborah said, “If you propose, I’ll say yes.”

Rose was elated and joked that she would be delighted to give Sean away. So, the processional evolved: Deborah would walk down the aisle alone, and Rose would give Sean away!

Brides no longer need to be given away by their fathers as we no longer live in a world where such practices are necessary. It was the conclusion of a contract where the father transferred ownership of his daughter to her husband.

Every entrance is unique and special. The right processional is the one that feels right for you. Don't be bound by ancient protocol if it doesn't resonate with you.

08/05/2024

New shoes and hot chocolate! What's not to like about today!

08/05/2024

When I first found this out, I thought it was quite archaic but there is a good reason for this. The ink used is of archival quality, meaning it is designed to withstand the test of time without fading or deteriorating. This ensures that the marriage record remains legible for decades to come.

However, a fountain pen marks the occasion and adds a touch of elegance to the act of signing.

07/05/2024

This was such a fun-filled ceremony! This was the second marriages for the couple, and they were blending two families together. With seven children, we created a handfasting with seven cords representing their seven children, plus one for the baby that never made it to earth. These were the colours of the rainbow plus a white one. The spectrum of colours blends together to create white. Add to that the two for Nikki and Bob, I had my work cut out to ensure the knot was tied securely! It was!

This moment mattered greatly for the couple and I was honoured to have been able to create this for them.

06/05/2024

From an inspirational speech made by MLK in 1960 at Spelman College.

05/11/2023

When I speak (at any given opportunity!) about funeral planning, I'm often asked how to start the conversation with family. I was reflecting on Ben's funeral today. Ben lived with Cystic Fibrosis so knew he was going to die young. Yet, any time I approached the subject of funeral planning, he always said "I'm not ready".

But he did speak about it passively. When we attended a funeral and the deceased had his hoody on his coffin, Ben said "when I die, I want my guitar on my coffin". Whilst playing Deep Purple's Burn, he stated he wanted it played at his funeral. After his uncle Alan, my brother, died Ben said he wanted his ashes divided between where Alan's ashes are and my mum's.

That's three conversations and three missed opportunities to delve deeper into having a dead good discussion.

Look for those comments and see where the conversation could take you!

29/10/2023

One of my favourite TV shows is The Repair Shop. The stories behind the items brought in are incredible. This one was no exception. The locket contains a lock of hair from the deceased. A beautiful piece of memorial jewellery.

I'd have loved bed to have been given a lock of Ben's hair but I wasn't offered this. You may think "well, you could have asked". My brain didn't have the capacity to think that and I was focused on the funeral planning and I was living in a surreal world.